How Danzo actually died was still only a guess in Akio's mind. He didn't act immediately; he planned to visit Orochimaru's laboratory later to get the real answer.
Even if Orochimaru wasn't the one who dismantled Danzo, he definitely collected samples from the body. With Edo Tensei, Akio could just drag Danzo's soul back and ask him directly.
But right now, Akio had more than enough on his plate.
First, there were the… romantic developments of his two students. If Nagato couldn't keep things steady with Konan, Akio feared he'd end up raising another brooding, love-starved prodigy. If every male student he trained stayed single forever, he'd never live down the reputation, no matter how long he lived.
Then there was the matter with Konoha.
For reasons Akio couldn't begin to guess, Hiruzen had marched nearly all of Konoha's remaining forces straight to the frontlines, determined to end the conflict with Iwa as quickly as possible. Apparently, Shinnosuke's injury had scared the old Hokage so badly his heart had nearly stopped.
Akio didn't doubt Konoha could crush Iwa if they truly threw everything at it, but even then it would take at least a month. Until then, the village itself was practically hollow, wide open for anyone bold enough to take a shot at it.
Akio had to keep an eye on this.
He didn't want Konoha's main base being wiped out while the army was gone, he'd never hear the end of that disaster.
And then, the biggest headache of all: Naruto.
Ever since he learned Kushina was planning to enroll him in the Uzushio academy, Naruto had launched what could only be described as a one-child rebellion. He'd caused mess after mess trying to protest.
Kushina was busy guiding Kimimaro's team, Minato had been stuck handling clan duties for a distracted clan head Nagato, and so the job of disciplining Naruto had fallen squarely onto Akio's shoulders.
And… well, as soon as Akio wasn't home, Naruto shattered his windows.
Eight times.
And Naruto's backside had paid for it eight times too.
But the kid never stayed down for long. His one unshakable goal? "I'm going to Konoha."
In truth, Akio agreed Naruto should go sooner or later for training, for experience, for story progression but Kushina was family. He'd watched her grow up. Sending Naruto away too early might genuinely make her furious with him.
These miserable days dragged on until February 3rd, when Akio finally got two days of peace.
After a month of D-rank missions, Kushina finally gave Kimimaro's squad a short break to prepare for C-rank work. That meant she'd finally have time to personally keep Naruto in line.
That night, Akio dove into bed with a smile.
"If I'd known it'd be like this, I'd have taken Kimimaro's team myself… honestly, this is all Naruto's fault. The little gremlin is like destiny's natural counter to old men."
One reason he'd rushed to send Kimimaro's team out was Naruto's Sexy Jutsu, which had shaken his will to live.
"At long last, I get a full night of sleep."
…
The next morning.
The pounding on the door jolted Akio awake. He sensed who it was and felt dread settle in.
"Minato… don't tell me Naruto sent you to tag in?"
Minato offered a sheepish smile.
"Elder… please come with me. Naruto caused trouble again."
"What kind of trouble needs me to clean up?" Akio asked, but Minato's serious expression wiped away his humor.
At Kushina's home, Akio found Naruto dangling upside-down, being disciplined.
"Well now," Akio said with undisguised amusement. "Looks like he really did it this time."
Kushina turned, exasperated.
"Grandfather, I can't believe you're smiling, Naruto went way too far!"
"How can I not smile at a moment like this? Come on, did he break someone else's window?"
Kushina gave him a sharp look.
"If you knew what he actually did, you wouldn't be laughing."
Akio blinked.
"My windows are fine… don't tell me he broke Ichiraku's?"
Naruto stuck his tongue out, making a face.
"Grandpa! Take me to Konoha!"
Smack. Kushina landed another strike.
"He was playing with the neighborhood kids last night," she said, "and decided to start telling them all about you and Sara."
Akio froze.
Slowly, the smile left his face.
"Good thing we caught it early. If all those kids had spread it around, the whole of Uzushio would know by now."
Akio sighed and glared at Naruto.
"Of all the things to mess with… Sara treats you like her own little brother."
He wasn't worried for himself, he was worried about Sara being dragged into rumors.
Naruto swallowed, trying to look brave.
"If you don't let me go to Konoha, I'll tell everyone in the village about you and Sara!"
Akio snorted.
"Trying to threaten me? I don't get threatened. Spread whatever you want. It's not some shameful secret, just annoying."
Kushina nodded.
"Exactly! If you let him blackmail you once"
"I don't get threatened," Akio repeated firmly.
Minato sighed.
"Elder, this boy's got more tricks than a street magician."
Akio walked up to Naruto slowly.
"All right then, what else have you got?"
Naruto's eyes darted.
"If you don't let me go to Konoha… I'll use Sexy Jutsu and turn into Miss Haku!"
Smack. Another hit from Kushina.
Akio stiffened… then straightened.
"Doesn't bother me. I've seen worse. A little brat can't shake my resolve."
"If you still say no… then I'll marry Haku-nii someday!"
This time, Naruto made sure to call Haku brother.
Smack.
Akio burst out laughing.
"That's not a threat, that's you volunteering for extra punishment. Kushina will beat the sense of romance into you."
Kushina cracked her knuckles. Naruto shrank back.
"Grandpa!" Naruto yelled. "If you STILL don't let me go, then I'll use Sexy Jutsu and transform into YOU!"
Akio opened his mouth
"I don't get threatened! Turn into me, parade through the whole village, won't change my"
He froze.
Then his face fell.
"…On second thought, that might be a problem."
"Grandfather!" Kushina snapped. "What happened to 'not threatened'?"
"I am not!" Akio insisted. "But if he transforms into me and runs around Uzushio naked, the whole clan will, ugh…"
He put a hand to his face.
"This child is going to be the death of me."
---
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