Seeing that Asher had no idea regarding abilities and source elements, Morgana decided not to keep this conversation long and went straight to the point.
"Source element that's the source of your abilities… Your ability originates based on your understanding of your element. For example, a person has wind as his source element, and he thinks of wind as a gentle breeze; then his ability will be similar to that… But if he thinks of it as a current of change, a tornado that destroys everything, then his ability will be similar to that."
I listened carefully to every word she spoke with a very strong understanding.
Hearing her, a new meaning started to form in my mind…
'Abilities are born from our understanding of the source element…'
'Each rank has different meanings…'
But how come my ability was [Static]?
No, I will need to decide later how my understanding shapes my ability.
Let's focus on the lecture right now.
"To reach enlightenment, you need to do three things." Raising her fingers before me, Morgana kept her words as precise as possible.
"You need to understand your will."
'My will?'
Seeing my confused expression, Morgana continued.
"It's how you wish to continue your journey and how your understanding of the source element will be… It's your will."
"Do you mean my decision will shape me and my fate to ascend?"
"Yes, but you will need to find the true meaning yourself as well. Even if I tell you my will, you will not understand it, as that will feel foreign to you."
"Do you know, Asher, why people never tell each other their source element directly?" She asked.
I thought for a moment, my understanding regarding awakeners has deepened a lot by now. And the hints Morgana has given were more than enough for me to reach a conclusion.
I took a deep breath and solemnly answered back.
"Because others can also affect your understanding and influence your path for ascension."
"Yes." She nodded.
I closed my eyes, feeling a sudden chill running down my spine. Her words were not just an affirmation of my doubts but rather a warning.
This world is unfair; no one was born equal and will not die as an equal as well. And in the middle of our lives, anyone can affect us and change our set path.
Such a scary thing it was…
That even our decisions and paths can be altered by others without even knowing. This was not just for mundane humans but especially harrowing for me.
"What's the next thing I need to do for enlightenment?"
Morgana paused, her eyes fixed on my own gaze.
"When you understand your will and path… you need to decide your next step. If I had to explain it in clear terms, it would be your definition for the next ability."
'Alright… Getting enlightenment is going to be a piece of work.'
My face had already hardened as I felt all the things that had happened till now to be fake.
I had no understanding of my element, yet I had become an awakened somehow. How was that even possible in the first place?
"So, if I follow those two steps, I can become a transcendent like you?" I asked.
Morgana's brows furrowed up, and her lips twitched slightly as she tried to suppress a small chuckle.
Licking her lips, she answered back.
"No, no, you can't; this is the third point. You need to have the potential to ascend and, most importantly, the time for your soul to get used to your vessel and mature. For some people it can happen very fast, while for others, very slow."
I frowned.
"How can I know if I have the potential or not?"
"Hmm… do you feel any kind of wall? Like an absolute force." She said, her voice unsure.
"No, I don't… I feel nothing."
She sighed.
"That's good to hear… The feeling is hard to describe, but it seems you have not reached your limit yet."
"I see, that's truly a relief."
Morgana softly nodded.
"Let's continue with some basics, and we can wrap this class up."
I nodded, but my mind felt heavy.
Morgana continued for some hours more, and I continued to stare at her.
This talk had not helped me reach any conclusion regarding enlightenment, but I had understood many things regarding it.
One was that enlightenment needed to be planned thoroughly, not just jumped at the moment someone got it.
My soul was already used to my vessel and matured according to Morgana's teaching…
This was a peculiar problem that had put me in a deep sense of internal crisis. The problem was not that my soul and vessel were ready to ascend, but the problem was how I hadn't planned my ascension last time in the dungeon's ruin.
It could be one of the reasons for not getting any enlightenment, and the second will obviously be that my soul was still not mature enough to become a transcendent yet.
Morgana, who had been teaching Asher about the basics, suddenly stopped, her eyes looking at Asher's, who stared at her without blinking even once.
His hands were still moving, meaning he was still taking notes. Yet she felt he was also in deep thought.
"Asher, I actually know the reasons for your worries." She said it with doubts.
"Huh?" I froze, my hands stopping midway as I tilted my head in confusion.
Morgana gently raised her hand and started to comb her hair; her eyes looked uncertain if what she was doing was correct or not. Several emotions flashed through them: doubts, worry, commitment…
Then, with a deep sigh, she raised her head again to look at me. "I have been told a lot about you… to tell the truth, just enough to make me curious. They said you could ascend faster than anyone in this world and had a lot of potential… You might not know it yet, but Asher, you are injured… a wound so deep that it can not be healed without special treatment."
Thump!
"What?!" I stood up, smashing the table under my palms loud enough for the room to make a cracking sound.
My throat started to go dry, and my heart beat loud enough to come out at any given second.
Morgana didn't panic, nor did she flinch at Asher's sudden outburst. Instead she said in an eerily calm voice, sending another chill through my spine.
"The reward is that treatment… after that you can once again start to ascend and gain enlightenment."
"Lady Morgana, please tell me everything you know about me." I asked, my voice shaking.
I was sure that she didn't know my source element or abilities. But she knew something about me that I wasn't aware of.
The Temple, unlike what I had previously thought, knew more than I could have imagined. They knew about my early enlightenment and ascension…
No, it feels like they knew it before I was even aware of it myself.
"Sorry, but I don't know anything about you… I only know what's been told to you." She said calmly.
Biting my lips tightly, I took deep breaths to calm myself.
"For how long has the Temple been keeping an eye on me, and what is the injury? I have not felt a single thing wrong with me." I asked, my voice tired and heavy.
I slowly shifted back to my seat, feeling defeated.
I even wanted to laugh, knowing that whatever I did seemed to be planned by someone. What was I even doing? Just saying useless things all this time.
My resolve for a moment felt meaningless…
"I am not aware for how long the Temple has been watching you, and it probably won't be wrong to say from the start as well… But those who knew about you are less than two people, including me. Please trust that." Morgana spoke gently, adding a touch of warmth in her words, trying to comfort me.
I looked up at her, only to see that unlike before, she was looking down.
Her gaze was heavy yet firm.
"I know…" I said.
She sighed, her eyes closed for a moment before speaking. "I was given a choice to either keep this to myself or tell you this as well… It was my choice to not keep you in the dark. As that would feel unfair, that would go against my understanding of my source element." She said the last part with a small sigh of relief.
"You have been telling me a lot, and I am even grateful towards you… for not keeping me in the dark. But answer me with either yes or no, as I can see you are reluctant to say this."
Morgana nodded, her figure leaning back.
"Was it the head of the Pandrix family or someone related to it who told you all of this?" I asked calmly.
Morgana's eyes instantly widened, her face clearly showing the chill she felt just now. Without delay she was about to raise her hand but stopped midway.
"Where did you hear that name?" She asked.
I could feel my body visibly relax as I finally let go of [Kairosflow] after seeing her reaction.
I smiled calmly after finally feeling a bit of control come back to me.
"Lord Elias, he spoke of that name to me… So, I just guessed."
Seeing Asher smirk, Morgana finally understood what he did just now.
Asher, after hearing her words, had knowingly acted down to gain Morgana's sympathy, and she, who all this time had shown a very compassionate nature yet firmly kept her lips shut about the name, fell for this question by showing her reaction.
She was tricked!
Seeing her staring at me in silence, I sighed and once again smiled at her.
"Don't worry, I know how you are feeling better than anyone… No one likes to be tricked, after all. Also, you never told me about my injury. Can you tell me about it now?"
With a sigh, Morgana finally calmed down. Her fist, which had been clenched all this time, opened up as she calmly stated.
"Your soul is broken; this is the reason you can't gain enlightenment, or so I have been told by the Pandrix family head."
With this bombshell thrown at me, I could feel my vision go blurry. My head started to pound loudly in pain as I leaned back, hitting my head loud enough for Morgana to shudder.
I truly wished deep inside my heart for this to not be true and cursed the one who did this.