PERCY.
I pulled up to the curb, my eyes scanning the bustling sidewalk until they landed on the familiar figure I was looking for, Gemini. He was seated inside a quaint café, bathed in the warm, golden light of the late early evening sun, chatting animatedly with Ohio. I could imagine the sound of their laughter bubbling up from their conversation like the effervescent fizz from a soda bottle that had just been popped open, filling the air with a contagious joy.
But as much as Gemini seemed at ease, my gut twisted, filled with a cocktail of emotions—annoyance, concern, and an unexpected twinge of hurt. A pang of betrayal settled in the pit of my stomach, like a cold, hard stone. He had lied to me, told me he was busy, when in reality, he was out here having fun with Ohio. The thought stung, making me wonder why he did not want to spend time with me instead. Why had he chosen to deceive to me about being too busy to hangout? The questions swirled in my mind, leaving a bitter taste in my mouth.
I stepped out of the car, the familiar chill of the season creeping into my bones as I walked into the cafe. His best friend saw me first and her eyes widened as she stopped talking and he turned too trying to figure out what had caught her attention.
"Hi, Ohio. How are you doing? I'm sorry to interrupt, but may I take him?" I greeted his best friend all in one breath as I sat beside him pulling a smile from her and a wary glance from him. I could see the tension in his shoulders, the way he avoided my eyes as if they burned. Ohio agreed with a quick nod, her curiosity certainly piqued.
I paid their bills, the clicking of the cash register feeling louder than ever in the quiet of my mind. I walked back to them and stretched out my hand to Gemini, quietly urging him to take it as I led him out of the cafe and he smiled and waved goodbye to his friend before we walked out.
As I ushered him into the passenger seat, I caught the slight fear in the way he sat. He avoided making eye contact, darting his gaze around like a deer caught in the headlights. When I leaned in to help him with his seatbelt, I heard a small squeak escaped him, and my heart somersaulted but I tried to act natural.
The drive back to my place was quiet, the air thick with an unspoken weight. I didn't feel the need to fill the silence with words; I wanted to understand his thoughts without forcing him to share. The radio hummed low in the background, but I was lost in my own headspace, only pulled back into reality when my phone rang.
It was a lady following up on a Valentine's gift I had contemplated getting for him before—something nice, something he might have liked. But at that moment, I had already changed my mind, sensing he wouldn't want to do anything with me. I couldn't shake the feeling that, maybe that was the reason he'd lied about the time his lectures ended and where he was truly headed.
Arriving at my place, the silence between us remained thick, palpable like the fog on a rainy day. I showered first and after Gemini showered and changed, I decided to order us some food. My hope was that a quiet meal together might coax him into relaxation. He's been on edge for some days now.
As we sat down to eat, I studied his posture, searching for any clue to decipher the mood that he was in. He appeared subdued, the usual spark in his eyes dimmed significantly. Tentatively, I reached out, my index finger tapping his forehead gently, as if to rouse him from the fog.
"Hey! Care to share what's going on in that pretty little head of yours? You've been spacing out all evening."
His gaze flickered up to meet mine, and I caught the blush that crept onto his cheeks. For the heartbeat of a moment, I anticipated a casual dismissal. But then he inhaled deeply, and I braced myself.
"I didn't mean to lie to you, Percy. I'm sorry." His voice wavered slightly, sincere, and it melted a layer of tension away from my chest. "I will be absolutely honest with you going forward, no matter what."
I nodded at him, a small smile creeping onto my face. I appreciated his honesty
"That sounds good, thank you." I replied, knowing that being truthful was paramount for both of us. I didn't like being lied to; we both needed transparency.
"It's just…today's Valentine's Day, and I didn't want to intrude on your space—maybe you had other plans, or someone coming over. I was going to head back to my dorm after hanging with Ohio. I didn't want to put you in an awkward position where you have to spend today with me out of pity." Gemini's words were steady, but I could see the mix of emotions swirling in his eyes.
My brow furrowed in confusion and then in pure amusement. But as I looked deeper into his eyes, understanding began to dawn on me like the rising sun after a storm.
"Gemini, I… I just wanted to spend the day with you. You know I don't like having people over, and it wouldn't be a pity thing if we spent Valentine together, you know that. I love having you around."
His gaze searched mine, vulnerable and soft.
"Really?"
I nodded, my voice earnest. "Really. Now, tell me what's really bothering you. I know it's not just about Valentine. Did someone say something to upset you? Did I do something?" Anxiety began to warm its way through me as I realized I needed to make sure he was really okay.
"Remember that day when you came for me, back when those girls were with us?" he asked, and my heart sank as I nodded, recalling the moment I had interrupted a gathering of snobby girls who looked like they were comfortable chipping away at his self-esteem.
"They were saying some… stuff," he said, picking at his food, his expression hinting at the hurt hiding just below the surface.
"What kind of stuff?" I asked, my anger simmering at the thought of these insufferable snobby brats.
"They were saying stuff like how I was taking up space in your life from people who deserve it. And that you're only hanging out with me because you're bored, and that I shouldn't get used to it."
Those damn snobbish spoilt pricks - I'd love to take them down a peg. They're lucky I don't hit girls. I understand that Gemini and I aren't actually in that kind of relationship but he's important to me. I mean, I do enjoy spending time with him; he lets me hold him when I sleep, thankfully. And I've made it pretty clear to the whole school that he's off-limits, that he's mine. And being around him makes me happy...but I don't know if he's actually interested in dating anyone.
"Should we just date for real, then?" I blurted out, astonished by my own words.
Gemini choked on his food, coughing violently and panic flared in my chest. Instinctively I rushed to his side, gently patting his back in a desperate attempt to help him regain his breath.
"Why would you just say something like that so casually?" He wiped his mouth, his cheeks flushed from coughing and the sudden twist of our conversation.
I shrugged, a casual demeanor probably not appropriate for the revelation I'd just laid bare.
"I mean, we've done practically everything couples do—well, most, anyway. We just haven't kissed on the mouth or had sex like real couples do." The last words rolled off my tongue, and his eyes widened as he started coughing again.
"I know you've never kissed anyone before; I didn't want to take that from you." I added, suddenly realizing the weight of my past interactions with him. Seeing him naked, kissing him on the forehead, sharing a hot tub together, the countless nights cuddled up sleeping—it all made our relationship feel so intertwined that it hardly made sense 'not' to date.
"Could you not say something so serious with that careless tone?" he exclaimed, his expression switching from shock to a mixture of disbelief and Incredulity.
"But, I am serious!" I replied, and the way he raised his brows, mixed with that adorable and serious pout, made my heart flutter even more.
"Listen to yourself, Percy. Do you even like guys?" he asked, tilting his head to one side, searching me.
I paused, wrestling with the truth—do I like guys? More importantly, have I ever liked anyone romantically before?
"I like you!" I said, taking a bite of my food, watching his reaction, knowing it would take a lot of convincing for him to even consider what I'm saying seriously.
"I'm talking about someone you want to be with. Like, romantically, and you know. Do everything you do with me...you know, but more and for real!" he said, a hint of awkwardness in his voice, as if he were trying to coach me through the labyrinth of dating life.
The corners of my mouth lifted into a smile, and I couldn't help but let out a soft laugh. His frown deepened in response, making me chuckle as I tried to stifle my laughter.
"I know what you mean. Yes, I want to do everything I already do with you for real...and more." I replied, shooting him a sly smirk that I hoped conveyed just how serious I was. I watched as a flush crept across his cheeks, a rosy hue blooming beneath his skin. The sight of him blushing was too cute to ignore.
"So, should we date then?" I pressed, testing the waters and sensing the tension in the air.
He rolled his eyes, but I could still see that shy blush lingering on his face, betraying his indifference.
"I'm going to pretend I didn't have this entire conversation with you. What was I even expecting?" he muttered, his attempt at sounding nonchalant clearly failing.
"Why? You don't want to date me?" I asked, a genuine inquiry slipping from my lips. I crossed my arms, leaning slightly forward, truly curious. If we already did everything together, why couldn't we just take that plunge?
"Just forget about it, okay?" he said, turning his attention to his plate, pushing food around as if it were the most fascinating puzzle to solve.
I sighed, rolling my eyes, knowing all too well that this was far from over, I want answers. The remainder of dinner passed slowly, with me peppering him with questions about his refusal to date me.
"Why not?" and "What's the big deal?" tumbled from my lips, one after another. His responses remained annoyingly consistent as he shrugged off my inquiries with a dismissive tone.
"You're not serious."
Each time, it was the same sentence, but each time, I felt my determination to understand him only grow. Why was he so reluctant to acknowledge what we have already? Now that I think about it, we're already acting like a couple anyway.
His stubbornness only fueled my resolve, and I couldn't shake the feeling that maybe, just maybe, he was scared of what might happen if we really did take that leap together.
I've never thought about it before but now I really want to date him.