Lucas really couldn't stand me. Since I moved into his house with my things, he had been avoiding me like the plague. It was late in the evening, and I hadn't seen him since breakfast.
Felix was already asleep in his room, and I longed to stay by his side. I wanted to finally have a serious conversation with Lucas — face to face. I had so many questions, so many doubts, but I was afraid to knock on his door. I didn't want to upset him any further by my presence.
I sat by Felix's bed, gently stroking his hair. My heart ached thinking about what he was going through — the torn soul, the helplessness, and the darkness that seemed to swallow him more each day, even despite the medication.
Suddenly, the door swung open abruptly. I jumped at the sight of Lucas.
"Wait, please," I whispered, feeling my words catch in my throat. His face wore an expression of displeasure and exhaustion.
"What do you want? I told you it's best if we don't draw attention to ourselves," he replied, stepping into the hallway. I followed him, and he closed the door behind us.
"Okay, I understand you hate me. But let's talk seriously — if only one last time."
He looked at me sternly for a moment, then let out a heavy sigh.
"What do you want to know?"
"Why did you want me to stay here? Why did you change your mind so suddenly when until now, you insisted I was poison to Felix and that I should stay away?"
Lucas crossed his arms over his chest and fixed me with a serious gaze.
"I still think you're his poison. Nothing's changed. But when I found out my brother wanted to kill himself, I got scared. Felix blackmailed me — he said he'd die if you weren't by his side. He missed you. He wanted to be somewhere safe. Here."
I furrowed my brows, still confused.
"So you're hoping my presence will restore his will to live? When you took him away from me, he said he couldn't be happy with me."
"He lied," Lucas said quietly. "He just wanted to protect you from me. Without medication, feeling unsafe, hiding every day, he panicked more and more. That's why he gave up."
He sighed again.
"Here, he feels safe — you're beside him, and I accepted it. It calms him. I believe it will help. If not, I'll have to take him to a locked ward — like you did a few years ago. You're the last resort."
"Can't they change his medication?"
"The psychiatrist told me that if the meds stop working and his condition worsens, the only option is a locked ward."
I realized the weight of his illness — that it was inherited from generations before.
"Why is it so advanced? He was treated... and now he's worse. I feel responsible for coming back into his life. But why can't he get better? Why does he look so deeply depressed?" I asked, voice trembling.
"It's genetic. Our grandfather — our mother's father — had mental illness too. No one helped him, so he died young. He committed suicide," Lucas said coldly.
I covered my mouth with my hands, tears threatening to fall.
"I swear I'll do everything to help him. I care about him so much."
Lucas looked away, his voice icy.
"I know. But that doesn't change the fact that I don't like your presence."
I wanted to say more, but he was already turning to leave.
"There's one more question," I blurted, heart pounding like a drum. "It's a bit different… from the past. When the art teacher… why did you help me, when you yourself raped a girl at sixteen?"
Lucas's brows knitted, anger flashing in his eyes.
"What are you talking about? I never raped anyone! You're crazy!" he hissed. "You should be grateful I helped you. Don't ask stupid questions. You're annoying me. I really can't stand you."
He turned and stormed off, shaking his head in frustration.
"Then one more question," I called after him. "Why did you order Sebastian to get close to Eve? He had no choice, and he broke up the family. You're awful if you take revenge on people close to me."
Lucas stopped at the door, his back turned.
"If she wasn't easy prey, Sebastian wouldn't have fallen for her. She has only herself to blame. Her boyfriend should have seen through it. Don't defend her just because she's your friend," he said, closing the door behind him.
I hated him for dragging innocent people into this mess, but part of me knew he was right. Eve — my best friend — showed her worst side. She insisted she was doing nothing wrong, but I couldn't forgive her for deceiving Mike and putting her child in danger.
*
It hurt my heart to think about my friend and Nana. At that moment, I felt like pulling out every strand of Eve's hair. I couldn't stop obsessing over what she was doing, what she might be hiding. And on top of all that, there was Felix — trapped in a terrible mental state, sinking deeper with each day, and I felt utterly powerless. What more could I possibly do to help him?
I cared for him so deeply, wishing with every fiber of my being that he could recover — that he might finally feel how beautiful life could be, free from the shadow of illness.
Tears welled up and streamed down my cheeks as I grabbed my phone. Despite the late hour, I dialed Eve's number, my fingers trembling.
"Are you crazy? I'm already asleep," she answered, her voice heavy with sleep.
"You can see how crazy I am if you don't swear to me right now that you won't see Sebastian again."
A curse mumbled under her breath, and I heard the clumsy shuffle of her getting out of bed. The door closed softly behind her as she walked away from her bedroom.
"You're lucky Mike is already asleep and didn't hear what you just said," she whispered.
"Well, if he did hear it—" I hissed into the phone. "I'm serious, Eve. If you don't promise me this, I'll call Mike and tell him everything. Maybe I'm acting like a bitch, even though I'm your best friend, but you're hurting my friend—and the child I love like my own."
There was a long pause before she spoke again.
"I promise I won't see him again. That night, Sebastian told me everything. He did it on Lucas's orders. He never really liked me back when we were teenagers. You were the one he was obsessed with."
Her laugh sounded hollow and forced, and I could hear the sadness dripping from her voice.
"He said I'm different now, that he's grown fond of me, and likes spending time with me. But that chance is gone because I have someone—and a child."
A stone lifted from my chest, heavy weight easing just a little.
"That moment made me see clearly. I'm an idiot. You were right, Selena. I had a wonderful guy by my side who accepted me from the start. More importantly, I have a child with him. And I was wasting my time chasing a bastard who never even liked me. I deserve to fry in hell."
"I'm glad you saw through it before you gave in to temptation. This stays between us," I said softly.
"I'm sorry, Selena. You're a great friend. You did all this for me and my family." Her voice cracked, tears threatening to spill.
Eve rarely cried. For her to break down like this meant she was truly broken inside.
"I wanted to yell at you, to stab you with a sour apple," I teased gently. "But I'm glad you realized your mistake. You should appreciate your guy and the love he gives you. You never know when something might change, so cherish every moment you have together."
"Why are you talking so strangely? Did something happen?"
I took a deep breath, hesitating for a moment. Could I say it out loud? But I had to get it out.
"Felix tried to kill himself. I'm at Lucas's place now. I'm living here temporarily because Lucas says I'm Felix's last resort."
"Oh my god," Eve whispered, shocked. "Is it really that bad? Like that woman said? He needs help. You and that madman can't do this alone!"
"What woman? What are you talking about? Who gave Mike the number to Felix's grandparents to warn me?"
"Selena... this might shock you. Maybe then you'll understand just how sick Felix is. He makes up images in his head that feel real to him. He believes them."
"What? Eve, you're scaring me."
I bit my finger nervously, staring at the blank wall ahead, my heart pounding.
"Mike met Felix's mother. His parents are alive, Selena. They lived in Canada until recently. He didn't kill them. That never happened." Her voice dropped lower, softer. "It was his mother who called you in the middle of the night to warn you. I think Lucas knows this too. You should talk to him."
My head reeled. I hung up without saying goodbye, stunned. My eyes remained wide open as I stared blankly at the wall, feeling as if I'd slipped into some kind of amok state.
Felix hadn't killed anyone. His parents were alive. All those terrible images were lies he had created in his mind — lies he stubbornly clung to.
And I didn't know which was worse.