"No! I'm poor!"
Hearing Eriri words Izumi Yu couldn't help but twitch the corners of his mouth at that.
How do you know I'm not short on money? he grumbled inwardly. If I wasn't poor, would I really be working at a convenience store, barely making ends meet?
But before he could voice even a fragment of this protest, Eriri seemed struck by a sudden, dangerous idea. Her body stiffened, her eyes darted nervously toward him, and then—before he could prepare—she pushed herself up on tiptoe, her face blazing, and pressed her lips against his.
Soft. Fragrant. Sweet.
That was the first thought that surged through Izumi Yu's head.
It was his first time experiencing the lips of a beautiful girl up close, and it was nothing like the vague ideas his brain had tried to cook up before. Just that single, fleeting kiss sent his heart leaping into his throat. For a moment, he really thought his soul might drift out of his body altogether.
He hadn't even registered what was happening before instinct took over. His tongue twitched forward of its own accord, his arms beginning to rise in a reflexive attempt to hold the girl closer—
Only to be met with a sharp, stinging pain that yanked him back to reality.
"I—I just wanted to… bribe you!" Eriri sputtered, face crimson as she scolded him for daring to escalate. Her voice trembled, but her twin tails swayed defiantly. "I don't have… any other ideas! So don't get greedy and try to push your luck with some French kiss!"
At the same time, she darted back a step, putting just enough distance between them to avoid being caught in his arms.
The timing wasn't coincidental. She had sharp ears, and she had already caught the faint creak of the front door opening outside the window. If her family walked in now, if they saw—Eriri would rather vanish into thin air.
Izumi Yu exhaled slowly, pulling himself together. "Sorry… it's just that Kashiwagi-sensei is too tempting."
The words slipped out before he could stop himself, his tone tinged with genuine apology. But his mind was honest—when a tsundere blonde took the initiative, could anyone in his place resist reacting?
"D-don't say things like that!" Eriri's voice went shrill with embarrassment, her face now so red it could rival a boiling kettle.
Looking at him standing there, utterly calm despite what just happened, made her want to bury her face in her hands. Her brain felt like it was about to short-circuit. Why had she done that? What kind of lunatic, in a moment of panic, thought that offering her first kiss was a reasonable solution?
It was mortifying. Incomprehensible. Completely irrational.
And yet…
Her fingers brushed her lips without her noticing, and the thought escaped unbidden: But it didn't feel bad.
The dangerous thought was ruthlessly crushed before it could root itself. No, she couldn't allow herself to think that way. She had done this purely for pragmatic reasons. Nothing more.
It was a bribe. A transaction.
If she convinced herself firmly enough, maybe she'd actually believe it.
Bolstering her resolve, Eriri raised her chin and declared with a trembling voice, "That was my first… first kiss! Since you've already taken advantage of me, you can't use this to blackmail me anymore, got it?!"
Her words were half command, half plea, but her expression was so adorably serious that Izumi Yu felt his chest ache with warmth.
Looking at the flustered girl, with her fair cheeks now covered in layers of crimson, Izumi Yu thought he might actually melt on the spot. He let a smile curl his lips as he replied softly, "Understood… Miss Eriri."
A soft beam of moonlight slipped through the window just then, draping the girl in silver like some ethereal veil. For a moment, she looked less like an ordinary tsundere and more like some delicate work of art that had sprung to life.
Inside the room, silence settled. Neither of them spoke. Instead, their eyes locked, each one reflecting the other's nervousness and excitement.
The atmosphere had shifted, subtle but unmistakable. Something fragile and sweet now lingered in the air between them.
Eriri, of course, was the first to break the silence. "D-don't get the wrong idea! Don't act like this is some romantic moment!" She flailed her hands slightly, her words tumbling over themselves. "I only did it to bribe you! That's all! I don't want to have any… any intimate relationship with you!"
Her protest was betrayed almost instantly by the feverish glow in her cheeks. She could say she didn't want it, but her body, her expression, and the little tremors in her voice said otherwise.
Izumi Yu chuckled quietly to himself, though he kept his expression gentle. "Alright, I understand, Miss Eriri."
"Huh?! A-again with that?!" Her heart skipped when she heard her own name on his lips. Just the way he said it—slow, deliberate, almost affectionate—was enough to send her blood pressure spiking. She turned her face away, trying desperately to hide how flustered she was. "C-call me whatever you want! But… Miss Eriri sounds weird. Either call me Eriri… or… or just Eri Sensei!"
The words left her mouth in a rush, and then she immediately regretted them.
Izumi Yu couldn't contain the laugh this time. She was so painfully tsundere it was almost textbook. First kiss? Sacrificed without hesitation. But now she was tripping over herself, demanding he call her by something less formal, while pretending not to care.
Classic Eriri, he thought with a smile.
"Then," Izumi Yu said gently, his voice teasing just enough to make her ears turn pink, "I hope Eriri can call me by my name too."
"H-huh?! You really want that?!" Her heart fluttered unexpectedly, and a strange warmth settled in her chest. She was delighted, she realized, but the realization hit too quickly. Her expression betrayed her joy before she could shove it back down, so she hurriedly schooled her features into neutrality. "…Since Yuu-kun insists, I suppose I'll reluctantly agree."
The word reluctantly was a flimsy disguise. Her lips twitched upward into a smile she couldn't quite suppress, no matter how hard she tried.
Izumi Yu saw it all, of course, and an impish spark glinted in his eyes. "If Eriri doesn't like it, there's no need to force yourself." He put on a deliberately disappointed expression, his voice softening like a wounded puppy's.
"W-wait! It's not that I don't like it!" she blurted instantly, panic flashing across her features. "It's actually… not bad. I-I just don't want to say embarrassing things out loud! Don't make me do it!"
Her voice shrank to a whisper by the end, betraying how utterly unaccustomed she was to being honest.
Izumi Yu tilted his head, that mischievous smile spreading wider.
It dawned on her a second too late.
"You—you did this on purpose, didn't you?!" Eriri's face lit up like a firecracker as she realized she'd been expertly baited. She clenched her fists, stomping her foot as she glared at him, humiliated. "You're unforgivable! To toy with a girl's innocence like this… you've gone too far!"
Her indignation peaked, and without thinking, she lunged forward. Her lips pressed against the side of his neck, not in tenderness, but in a fierce little bite.
For an instant, the softness of her lips made his pulse skip, but then the sharp sting of her teeth reminded him it was less of a kiss and more of a punishment.
"Gah—!" Izumi Yu winced, caught between pain and laughter.
.....
Two small, bright red tooth marks appeared on Izumi Yu's neck, standing out against his skin even more vividly than a hickey. They were almost comical in how conspicuous they looked—like Eriri had stamped her claim there for all the world to see.
Great. Just great.
[Feeling the lethality of the girl's fangs, a bold idea suddenly arises in your heart. Presumably, these fangs can bring you an unprecedented new experience. You decide to let the girl in front of you…]
…This was no longer a bold idea. It was a life-threatening one.
Izumi Yu immediately rolled his eyes, dismissing the intrusive, ridiculous narration that seemed hellbent on convincing him to throw away his entire future. Unprecedented new experience, my foot. That "experience" would be the end of me.
"Hissss—! Eriri, you're trying to suck my blood!" Izumi Yu winced as the pain on his neck throbbed, his hand instinctively rising to rub at the fresh bite marks. His tone was half accusation, half helpless surrender.
Sure enough, tiger fangs were lethal weapons. Combined with the girl's… well, let's say generous Kanto Plain, Izumi Yu had the sinking realization that being alone with Eriri meant a high risk of injury and a guaranteed loss of two favorite "entertainment activities."
Still, if he had to be honest, her legs were quite the masterpiece. Long, pale, delicate—a rare work of art. He consoled himself with that thought, though it didn't stop the stinging pain in his neck.
"Humph! That's right, I'm going to suck your blood. In fact, I'll suck you dry!" Eriri announced proudly, baring her little fangs in a way that was meant to be intimidating but looked more like a mischievous cat playing predator. "That's your punishment for having such indecent thoughts, Yuu!"
Her triumphant expression lasted a full two seconds before she realized, belatedly, how strange those words sounded when spoken out loud. Her face turned crimson, heat flooding her cheeks as she slapped a hand over her mouth.
Because if anyone else had overheard just that line—"I'll suck you dry"—they'd think she and Izumi Yu were doing something very different from kissing and biting.
"Wait, what did you just say…?" Izumi Yu blinked at her, stunned. His eyes widened. Oh no. Does Eriri actually have some kind of hidden vampire fetish?
He let the thought sink in for a beat and shivered.
Luckily for him, he hadn't caught the earlier mischievous suggestion from the narrator. That spared him from further panic. Eriri's tsundere traits were dangerous enough—if she also shared Kato Megumi's strange hidden attributes, his kidney, which had loyally accompanied him for many years, might truly be in peril.
As long as two ○○ji didn't suddenly appear in his life, he told himself, he could probably manage with his current stamina. Probably.
"Anyway," Eriri said after finally wrestling down her embarrassment, "what happened today must stay a secret. I don't want to hear any stupid rumors flying around!" Her serious tone almost fooled him into thinking she was calm again. "You've already received so many benefits from me. That should be enough incentive to keep quiet, right?"
"So many benefits…?" Izumi Yu blinked, bewildered. He mentally counted on his fingers. A kiss. A bite. Some shouting. Were those really considered benefits?
"You—! You dense idiot!" Eriri's blush deepened as she stamped her foot, glaring at him. "Isn't it a huge benefit already that you get to call a talented and beautiful girl like me by her name?!"
Izumi Yu tilted his head, lips twitching. He decided it was safer not to argue. "Fine, fine. Let's leave it at that."
"What do you mean 'leave it at that'?! This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity! Most people would dream of it!" Eriri huffed angrily, her twin tails bouncing as she pointed a finger at him. "Yuu really is a greedy man, never satisfied no matter how much he gets!"
He chuckled softly, then lowered his voice to something gentler. "Anyway, I'll keep everything that just happened a secret. Including the fact that Eriri gave me her first kiss."
"Don't say it out loud, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Eriri practically exploded, her entire face lighting up red as she waved her hands in a frantic attempt to erase his words from existence. "If you dare to go around telling people I'm your girlfriend, I'll… I'll never forgive you!"
But even as she shouted, her chest felt warm in a way she couldn't quite describe.
They had kissed. No matter how much she tried to frame it as a bribe, no matter how much she scolded him for overstepping—it was still her first kiss. And his lips had been the ones to take it.
So… doesn't that make us halfway to being boyfriend and girlfriend? she thought, her heart thumping faster.
Her gaze flickered to his face. Izumi Yu didn't look like someone who already had a girlfriend. He seemed… free. Available.
But then Eriri shook her head violently. Wrong! I'm not the kind of girl who would just become someone's girlfriend so casually. No way. If it's going to happen, he has to confess first!
Her stomach twisted at the thought. What if he never did? What if he just let things hang like this forever? The idea made her temples pound as though her CPU was overheating, sparks threatening to fly out of her head.
Izumi Yu tilted his head. "Huh? If Eriri hadn't mentioned it herself, I wouldn't have thought of it. But now that you say it… could it be that Eriri is hinting? That a kiss means we have to date?"
"Wh-what?! I'm not hinting at anything!" Eriri shouted back, panicked. "And what do you mean, kissing doesn't mean dating?! Then what, do you just go around kissing anyone?!" Her eyes widened in suspicion, bitterness and jealousy flashing through her expression. "Yuu-kun… have you kissed that many girls already?"
Her gaze swept over his annoyingly handsome face, but she couldn't muster the proper contempt she usually reserved for so-called scumbags. No matter how much she tried to glare at him, her heart betrayed her with a traitorous flutter.
There was no helping it. He was simply too handsome.
Even if he were a scumbag, Eriri knew she'd struggle to truly hate him.
"No, no, no, that was my first kiss too." Izumi Yu shook his head quickly, his voice suddenly serious.
Of course, he conveniently left out the detail that, according to certain questionable "ancestral wisdom," a man's first kiss reset automatically at midnight every day. By that logic, it would always be his first kiss.
"Yu-kun's first kiss too?!" Eriri's eyes widened. She didn't know about the ridiculous reset theory and took his words at face value. A smug little smile tugged at her lips despite herself. "Then we're even! But remember, this was just a… a confidential exchange. Don't think you can use it to blackmail me into dating you!"
"Hmm… I see." Izumi Yu nodded thoughtfully, studying her expression.
Still, he couldn't shake the feeling that Eriri's words carried a certain double meaning. The way she looked at him, the way her voice lingered—it was almost as though she wanted him to make it official, to declare it to the world.
The way puppies marked trees to declare ownership… that was the vibe Eriri gave him right now.
"Eriri? Yuu-kun? Are you two in there?" Suddenly, Sayuri's gentle voice came from outside the door, shattering the delicate tension in the room.
"I'm showing Yuu my work!" Eriri blurted out before he could say anything, her tone pitched a little too high to be casual.
"Oh, I see. Then I won't disturb you two." Sayuri's voice carried a knowing lilt. Outside, her lips curved into a faint smile. "So these two children really do get along. Eriri has changed her attitude so quickly…"
Sayuri knew her daughter's personality better than anyone. For Eriri to shift so dramatically in such a short span of time was rare indeed. The boy inside must be someone special.
…
With Sayuri's footsteps retreating, the two of them were left alone once more. Silence stretched, awkward but not entirely unpleasant.
"If you want to read something, Yuu-kun, go ahead," Eriri finally said, her tone regaining some of her rich-girl composure. "I'll prepare some signed doujinshi for you."
"Then I'll take you up on that," Izumi Yu smiled. "I'll give you a signed copy of mine later, too. And if Eriri wants something signed by Eromanga-sensei, I can arrange that as well."
"Wh-what?! You can get an autographed doujinshi from Eromanga-sensei and you didn't tell me sooner?!" Eriri's eyes widened, her composure cracking instantly. She leaned forward in disbelief, cheeks pink. "If you'd told me earlier, maybe we wouldn't have had so much trouble!"
But even as she said it, a small, traitorous thought slipped into her heart.
Maybe she didn't mind the trouble.
Because without it, would her relationship with Izumi Yu have shifted this much?
(2800 words...)