Chapter 260: Efficient Egg Factory (1)
"You guys like harpies?"
I couldn't keep this amazing harpy poultry farm to myself.
The lady boss had said she usually stayed alone after 6 p.m. when the employees went home, and after that, we could come anytime. She even added, "If possible, I'd appreciate it if you brought more people."
Besides, these things were always in heat. Wouldn't it be a waste not to bring anyone?
"Why harpies all of a sudden? You had an egg the other day, and now you're into bird-fucking or something... mmph!"
I silenced Levin's twisted words by pressing his lips shut with my hand.
"So? You like harpies or not?"
"Mmmfghhmph!"
Whatever he was trying to say, it probably wasn't worth hearing.
"Aren't harpies monsters? Not even a demi-human species, and mindless monsters at that. Still kinda weird."
"Are they hot, though?"
Jake clearly wasn't into them (fucking basic-ass human taste), but Dane seemed interested.
"They are hot."
"Mmph! Mmphf!"
"Damn, you're noisy. What's your point?"
I let go, and Levin, rubbing his now-swollen lips, finally responded.
"Aren't harpies bird-bottomed? That makes 'em useless! A girl's appeal is all in the lower half."
"...No, they've got everything up to the thighs."
"Oh...?"
Jake was clearly out, so that left Levin and Dane.
"I found a great place. A totally legal spot where you can mess around with harpies. It's not far, and they have cute harpies and a charming countryside poultry farm vibe. Interested?"
"Coming from you, it sounds shady."
"Wouldn't it smell all birdy?"
"They're all washed and clean. Smell like soft down and a little human skin scent, that's all."
"...How do you even know that?"
"Various methods. So, are you in or not?"
Dane raised his hand immediately, followed by Levin.
"Honestly, a hole's a hole, right?"
"Exactly. Heh."
Just like that, I roped in three from our squad room. Jake was the only holdout.
"I have a feather allergy..."
"You eat chicken just fine though. What's your excuse?"
"Do you chew feathers when you eat chicken?"
"Just come along. Why be the only one left behind?"
"...It does sound kinda fun."
I was this close to roping in all three roommates from squad room 2.
Of course, I had a good reason to drag them along.
"Wasn't it 500 gold per guy I bring?"
For each healthy knight I brought, the boss would hand over 500 gold. Of course I had to bring them.
Win-win for both of us.
---
We considered renting a carriage using Jake's allowance, but the lady boss said we could just say we were heading to her place, and the carriage fare would be charged to the merchant guild. So no need to spend anything getting there.
We comfortably changed into our going-out clothes and boarded the carriage.
"Ugh... why do I have to sit in the same compartment as this guy..."
"You're the smallest."
Jake and I sat in the forward-facing seats while Dane and Levin took the backward-facing ones. Sitting next to the big guy Dane, Levin looked like he was about to get crushed.
"Just hang in there."
"You're the one with a sturdy body, you should sit here... the weight's unbalanced... blegh..."
His guts were about to pop out. How crushed was he?
"Oh, so that's what an esophagus looks like."
"Is that what death by crushing looks like?"
"Gurrggh!!"
Maybe I should've left one behind.
Before long, we arrived at the harpy poultry farm.
"Welcome, knights! Welcome to the harpy poultry farm!"
I had let her know ahead of time that I'd be bringing three knights. She greeted us with a bright smile and even a welcome banner.
"Oh!"
Of course, with her voluptuous body, bright smile, and clothes sticking to her sweaty skin, Dane and Levin were practically leaping off the carriage. Even Jake seemed impressed, suddenly switching into white knight mode.
"Nice to meet you. I'm Dane, defense specialist from the Magic Knights."
"Levin, assault knight of the Magic Knights."
"Welcome. I'm just a humble boss here at the poultry farm."
Jake quickly got off, about to shake her hand, when he suddenly paused and looked up at the sky.
"Hmm?"
Screech!
"Don't worry. Seems there's a bird of prey living nearby."
I heard that same screech when I first arrived. No reports of attacks though, so it was probably just a hawk living in the area.
The merchant guild was planning to call in rangers as a precaution.
'Could a hawk really snatch up a harpy the size of a person?'
Even if hawks can grab sheep, snatching up a harpy-sized creature was a different story. Besides, they rarely left the farm anyway.
"A bird of prey near the capital? Weird. Usually rangers scare them off before they can mess with livestock."
"The merchant guild's been contacted about it."
"Pleasure to meet you, ma'am. I'm Jake. If you want, I could take care of that hawk for you..."
'You only have a 30-meter range handgun, you poser...'
Still, the lady boss looked genuinely happy to see more knights, and the mood was light and cheerful.
"Perfect timing. We've prepped the harpies for efficient production. You can start right away."
"Start...?"
"Didn't you get the briefing?"
At that, all three of them looked at me.
"You said we'd get to mess around with harpies."
"You serious...?"
"I thought you meant like looking at chicks and eating grilled chicken..."
Was my credibility really that low? I tried imagining if I'd believe this if Dane or Levin said it to me.
'Yeah... I probably wouldn't believe it either. Dammit.'
"What exactly do you mean by 'mess around'?"
Still suspicious, Levin asked. I spread my hands, mimicking a cloaca on one and a dick on the other, making a thrusting gesture.
"..."
Their eyes changed.
Zap!
The guys who had just come to chill were now firing up their mana circuits, fully activating their bodies. Was this how I looked when I went after girls?
"No first-come-first-served, or limits, or costs?"
"None of that."
"YEEEEEEAAAAHHHH!!"
Dane roared like a beast. Levin cheered. Only Jake still looked uneasy.
"But I have a feather allergy..."
"Then you're out."
"I'll just take some allergy meds."
'Wow, these guys are serious.'
Everyone was fully powering up with mana. Even Jake had activated his circuits and was bulking his muscles up, meaning he wasn't just mouthing off—he was committed.
"Everyone ready?"
"YES, MA'AM!!"
They sounded like first-year recruits. These days, recruits barely grunt when asked to shout.
"Then come this way."
She led us to a different building than before—a shed tucked away in a corner.
'Guess she prepped a separate place since there's more of us? Not that we need it...'
Honestly, these guys would be happy with just a harpy each, even if it was on bare ground. Jake would complain, but he still came with allergy meds and his mana circuits firing, so he wasn't about to say no.
"Here we are."
She beamed as she opened the shed door, and we all stepped in eagerly, expecting to see cute harpies.
'Huh?'
Something felt off.
No, very off.
Normally, the poultry farm had soft dirt and sand inside, with straw in the corners where harpies could rest or lay eggs. But this time, it was different.
Since it was near dusk, the inside was dim. I could barely hear soft chirping, but no sign of movement.
"...What the...?"
We all activated mana in our eyes at the same time, letting us see in the dark and assess the situation inside.
And once we saw it clearly, we were shocked.
"Oh right, I forgot to turn on the light. Didn't want to scare them... here."
She lit an oil lantern, giving us enough light to see clearly without magic.
"What... is this?"
Dane murmured, practically groaning.
Wooden posts were lined up, with planks positioned to hold people in place. The planks had openings at the center, like a lid that could close around something.
Inside each one was the slim waist of a female, and facing our direction were their round asses and tightly shut pink cloacae.
"What is... going on here?"
Yes.
All the harpies who had previously been roaming freely were now fixed in place by the waist on these planks, lined up in front of us.
Their asses were on display, locked in place.
"To make things more efficient, I set up a laying room. Do you like it?"
With a sweet country-girl smile, she beamed at us.
'...This boss knows exactly what gets a guy going.'