"When Ysevel showed me the flow of her mana in the fourth stage, there was a definite pulse whenever she moved the mana around. This time, however, it was far more subtle, leading me to realize that her control over mana reminded me of my mother's," I said, trying my best to explain what I felt in the Wraith realm.
"But that takes years of training in the fourth stage," Irun chimed in as he rubbed his chin. "What else have we been doing here?" I asked bluntly. "We've spent every cycle since coming here relentlessly training, whether it be armed or unarmed combat, using mana perpetually throughout those sessions. It only makes sense that she's so close," I summarized briefly. "That… makes a lot of sense," he replied after a slight pause, unable to find a hole in my argument.
The silence that followed was broken by a soft chuckle from Kalia, making us all look at her with confusion written all over our collective faces. "It seems we might have yet another gap building between you two," she gestured to Ysevel and I. "Egeshe krag, who would've thought I'd be teaching a potential fifth stage?" she asked no one in particular.
I felt a sense of both pride and frustration come over me. I was proud that Ysevel had grown so much during our training but frustrated that the sheer gap in our abilities had grown that much further.
"Well, I'm not there yet," Ysevel said, understanding the slight turmoil in my core. "Besides, Siraye already promised me that she would help me break into the fifth stage. She'd probably kill me if I figured it out without her help," she continued, likely imagining my mother's unbridled rage when she found out.
It made me chuckle at the thought, but I was quickly brought back to reality as I smacked my own face with both my hands. Athar, of all people, was likely the only one who understood what I was doing since everyone else seemed shocked. "Oooh, someone's excited," I heard his alternate voice say. "Not so much excited as ready to try again," I replied, immediately feeling my stomach rumble with hunger shortly after.
"You should probably get some food and bitter in you before you try to die on us again," Irun suggested between laughs. "Yeah, you're probably right," I admitted. Ysevel and Kalia helped me to my feet since the ache in my core was still very much present.
After trying to subjugate the bottomless pit that was my stomach, I felt much better than I had only an hour prior. Kalia even went so far as requesting more food from Krozz, though, to him, it was probably an instant return of an empty platter with a note attached. I could all but see the surprise and confusion on his face when the platter came back through the portal with more food and a note that Kalia read aloud.
"Don't die," she read with an amused chuckle, prompting the rest of us to laugh. It was comforting to know that he genuinely cared about us, even though his existence a few years ago would have been unheard of to me.
After we, rather I, had finished eating, the rest of them retired to their bedrolls while Ysevel laid her head on my chest. "You know, I was really worried about you," she said softly, idly playing with my linen shirt. "I'm sorry. I was just so taken aback that you've come so far that I couldn't contain myself. I didn't know that was going to happen, though," I admitted bashfully, earning me a tighter squeeze from her around my torso.
"I know," she said quietly. I could feel her genuine worry come through our connection, making me feel guilty for having worried her so much. I glanced over at Kalia, who, with a nod of understanding, dimmed the strength of her connection to us. "Just promise me that next time you'll be more careful and actually focus when Kalia tells you to," she said in a muffled voice. "I promise," I replied in a warm, understanding tone as I kissed her forehead.
"Yuck," I heard Athar's alternate mutter under his breath, and a sharp slap resounding shortly after. I sighed through my nose with a smile on my face and tried to get some rest as I hugged her close.
Hours must have gone by, but no matter what I tried, I couldn't sleep.
Probably because I've been sleeping for three whole cycles, I surmised. I glanced over at Kalia, who seemed deep in her meditation, while Ysevel was sound asleep with a bit of drool in the corner of her mouth.
I gently shuffled out from beneath her, replacing my chest with the pillow behind my neck. I was glad to see I hadn't woken her up and wrapped my portion of the bedroll around her snugly.
You've had a hard time falling asleep, I see, Kalia's voice resounded in my head. I've been asleep for long enough, I replied with a mental shrug. Are you going to try again? You almost died last time, she asked with an air of caution laced in her words. It's been five years since we came here, even longer since I reached the third. I have to try again, I replied with a heavy sigh.
There's no shame in resting for another cycle, you know, she said, likely already knowing how I would reply. I know, but that wasn't my first brush with death, and it certainly won't be my last, I replied, gingerly kissing Ysevel on the temple. I guess there's no stopping you, is there? Kalia mentally sighed. You know me so well, even your usual conversational language has shifted, I added with a grin.
That's because I've been tethered to your thoughts and emotions the past five years, she said sardonically to which I quietly giggled, knowing she was right. Come over here, I'll assist you as your conduit again, she motioned from the center of the dome. Thanks, I replied graciously.
I moved over to where she was kneeling just beside the obelisk and crossed my legs as I sat down in front of her. I'll ask you one more time: Are you sure you want to try again? The strain on your core must be painful, she asked with genuine concern. I'll be alright, I said, trying to put on a brave face.
I knew she wasn't going to believe me regardless of what I said, but with a firm, determined nod, I stepped back into the Wraith realm as she put her hand on my core. The realm immediately responded to my presence, as the mana that was once drawn towards me came rushing back to welcome me like an old friend.
I did my best to keep it under my control as I felt it course throughout my translucent form. Focus on slowly bringing it in towards your core, Kalia said through her own form within the realm. I did as she asked and slowly allowed the mana to move from my limbs towards my torso.
Good, very good. Now, gently urge it towards your core and focus only on that. I'll keep it steady while you focus on that, she said with a mental nod of approval. I felt for the edges of the mana around my torso and gently used a mixture of my will and mana to begin pulling it towards me. There was no need to rush this process, but I could definitely feel the strain on my core force me to wince and furrow my brow.
Focus, Kalia reminded me mentally. I quickly reverted my attention to what was happening within the Wraith realm and continued pulling the mana toward my core. When it reached the outer limits of it, I gingerly pulled a small tendril into it, feeling only a slight burst of power.
I continued this process for a while, making sure that I wasn't about to overload my own core with mana, as causing it to break without having someone there to re-seal it like Ren would be an actual problem. Slowly but surely, I felt Kalia's control over the mana at the edges of my torso begin to wane as she slowly relinquished her hold over it.
I could see Ysevel's prone form begin to shift through the Wraith realm, but whether she noticed what I was doing and woke up, I couldn't tell.
My sole focus in that moment was not to die, after all.
You're doing well, but now comes the hard part, Kalia sent as the last bit of mana I'd gathered in my torso began to flow into my core. You're going to have to draw more mana and cycle it from your core out towards your body, she said, pushing her own mana out of my body. That's insane, I noted. Insane, sure, but you were the one who wanted to try again, she retorted quickly.
I knew that she was right, of course, but the idea of welcoming in more mana seemed like an insurmountable task.
"You can do it, Thoma," I heard Ysevel whisper beside me. At some point or another, she'd crept out of bed and made her way over to us without me noticing, though I suspected Kalia had noticed well before I did. "I'll try," I whispered back, refocusing my efforts on the task at hand. "I've seen you overcome all kinds of obstacles, but this is not one of them. Do it," she urged.
The kind forcefulness of her words shifted something in my mind, and when I returned to the Wraith realm, I immediately beckoned the mana towards me. It wasn't only her words that prompted me to do it, but Kalia's nodding, translucent form also helped to push me beyond my own limitations.
I suddenly remembered that the same feeling was present when I'd gotten control over my third stage. Granted, I was a lot more emotionally unstable back then to fully acknowledge it. Still, there was a noticeable shift in my mental state that I was only truly able to identify now.
Push through, my brother's words came into my head.
While I knew he wasn't actually saying them because he was in the Between, the memory of him teaching me how to wield mana alongside Taegin came to the forefront of my mind.
I accepted the mana from the scarlet sphere into my form and pushed as much as I could into my translucent form. It grew increasingly opaque as a result of my doing so, and I knew instinctively that I couldn't stop there. I drew more and more until my entire form filled to the tips of my fingers with mana.
Push through, Kalia said, having seen the memory of my brother appear in my thoughts. I did as she asked, and with one final tendril of mana, I filled my last finger with mana.
As soon as I did so, there was a spherical pulse of mana that moved outwardly from my body. It wasn't as large or as forceful as the first one Ysevel, and I had experienced when we drank Ren's tincture, but it was enough to envelop the three of us in it. I felt it quickly retract towards me and lock into place around my core.
"Thoma!" Ysevel said aloud, having been slightly knocked back from the pulse. Kalia, too, had been forced to shift her position a little, as I could tell from the scraping of her armored kneecap across the dome's floor.
My eyes were still closed for a moment, but I knew I was alright. My senses had heightened far beyond what I was used to in the third stage, and a grin began to grow on my face when I realized what happened.
I'd finally broken through to the fourth stage.
I reopened my eyes only to find there wasn't a thin, murky cloud of mana surrounding them like in the third stage. In fact, my vision was clearer than it had ever been before. I could smell everything, from the sweat on my brow to the tears of what I thought was joy in Ysevel's eyes. I could also hear Athar's soft snoring from where I was, which was a genuine surprise to me as well.
"Scarlet eyes," she said in disbelief, her jaw plummeting to the floor before a bright, warm smile grew on her face. She moved in to hug me so tightly that I thought my ribs were about to be crushed. "Welcome to the fourth stage," Kalia said with a sigh of relief.
"Thank you," I said, my voice entirely unaltered by the sheer amount of mana coursing through both my body and my core. I could see the mana emanating from both Kalia and Ysevel as clearly as a cloud in the sky. "I couldn't have done it without you. Both of you," I said, hugging Ysevel just as tightly as she was me.
I could recognize mixed feelings of pride, joy, and relief flooding into me from both of them, forcing me to shake my head as I refocused my attention on the two of them. "That's, uh, that's going to take some getting used to," I thought, realizing just how much more intense everything felt.
"We'll have plenty of time for that," Kalia said, raising a hand to stop me. "Right now, I want you to revel in your achievement, as what you've done is no small task," she said with a prideful look in her eye. "But what you really mean to say is that you want me to keep this up at the same rate as I did the third stage," I added with a wry grin. "You know me too well," Kalia shrugged.
"Does this mean you'll be able to teach us your movement skills?" Ysevel asked excitedly, pulling away from me just as quickly as she had hugged me.
"It does. That and so much more," Kalia replied with a single, firm nod as a wolfish, toothy grin showed on her small face.