Majori's POV:Am I about to die?I begged to die, yet why am I so afraid now? Ryder said he would give me an injection that would let me leave peacefully. He did not lie. There is no pain, no feeling that I am about to die, everything just comes like a wave of sleep that I experience every day. Maybe in just a few more minutes, my wish will be granted. But right now, I feel more terrified and panicked than ever. Suddenly, regret and unwillingness fill me. I do not want this.
Death is not what I truly want, is it? Even I have to ask myself that question, yet I dare not give the answer.
From the corner of my eyes, two warm tears fall and slide down my face. My eyes are closed, yet it feels as if another world has opened inside my mind. I suddenly see Vincent, see him as he was at seventeen, on the day I foolishly stole money from my parents because of a so-called investment with my friends, only to lose everything. I was too scared to go home, so I hid in the forest, crying helplessly and trembling with fear at the thought of the punishment and scolding I would face if my parents found me.
At that moment, I truly thought of ending everything. But when I stood at the edge of the cliff, I was afraid. I feared the pain, and I also feared that someone would be sad if I disappeared.
As night fell, my fear grew stronger. I knew my parents would eventually find me; hiding there only delayed the inevitable. The forest at night was terrifying, cold, and dark, stirring my most primal fear. The cries of wild animals and every little sound made me jump and curl up in fright.
Then, suddenly, I heard footsteps.
Panic rushed through me. I thought it was my parents or someone from town looking for me. I hid in the shadows, and the beam of a flashlight made my heart race even faster. I stood up and tried to move deeper into the cave, but my foot suddenly slipped, and my whole body fell into a hole. With a loud thud, I hit the hard rocks below. Yet even then, I did not cry out. I felt the pain, but a dark thought entered my mind. Maybe if I hurt myself more seriously, my parents would not scold me so harshly. My father would not beat me. They might pity me instead, and I would have an excuse to escape punishment.
I groped for a rock, bit my lip, and raised it high, ready to strike my own leg. But just then, a flashlight shone directly on me, and a voice called out in panic, "Majori."
It was not my parents or any adult. It was him.
My eyes widened, my arm froze midair. I looked up at him, a handsome seventeen-year-old boy with golden hair, blue eyes, and pale skin. His face was full of worry, fear, and urgency. His chest and shoulders rose and fell rapidly, showing how long he had been searching for me without rest.
"Vin… Vincent…" My voice trembled as if I were about to cry. He was the first to find me, it was him. But as I tried to move toward him, pain held me back. I collapsed to the ground again, groaning in agony.
"Majori, let me… let me help you up." His voice cracked, his eyes red with tears. He reached out his hand to me."Give me your hand. I will pull you up."
His hand was so close, just a short distance away. All I needed to do was raise mine to touch it. I longed to feel his hand, to be pulled out of that hole, to feel his warmth again—the place where I always felt safe.
But when my hand was about to reach his, I hesitated.
"Vincent…""Majori, give me your hand, quickly, give it to me.""Vincent…" Tears streamed down my face. I looked up at him, into his eyes filled only with fear and worry. He did not understand. He leaned closer, trying to reach me, but I pulled my hand back again. His hand stopped midair, frozen.
"Majori, come home with me. I am here. You have me. Do not be afraid.""Vincent, but… I did something wrong. Something very bad.""It is all right. I am here. I already returned the money to your parents. They are not angry anymore. Come home with me. You have me. As long as I am here, no one can hurt you. I will protect you." His voice was steady, filled with gentleness and comfort. But that was not what I meant."Vincent, you will never forgive me…""Whatever you did, I can forgive you. Right now what matters is that your leg seems broken. Come home with me, listen to me, please."
I trembled. My arm dropped under his shocked gaze. I covered my face and slowly shook my head."You will not forgive me, Vincent. I… I cannot go home with you.""Majori, what are you saying? Whatever it is, I can protect you. Give me your hand. Let us go home. It is dangerous here in the forest.""No, I cannot go with you. Vincent, forgive me."
Yes, if he knew what I had done, how could he ever accept me? He would hate me, even feel disgusted. If he knew, it would bring trouble to him. He was good, innocent. Better to let him think I was heartless than to let him see the truth.
"Majori, I will be angry.""Majori, if you do not give me your hand, I will come down there. And after this, I will never wait for you after school again.""…"
His voice carried both anger and despair. When I finally uncovered my face, everything around me was blurred, except for his eyes filled with disappointment—the same eyes he had the day I turned him down for Brian.
I am sorry. I can no longer go home with you.
Everything faded into darkness. I must be dead now. If I die, everything will be buried with me. He will never know. He will go on with his life. Now he is the King of the Lycans, ruler of a great land. He has everything. He will be happy.
Then suddenly, that familiar voice echoed again."Majori, Majori, wake up, wake up, can you hear me? Why is this happening? Rin, call the doctor, call the doctor now!"
It was strange, that voice pulled my consciousness back. I could not see, but I could feel how desperate Vincent was, how his voice trembled as if he were crying.
"Why is there no breath, why, do you really want to leave me this much? Wake up, wake up now. Do not think that doing this will make me forgive you. Never.""Majori, I am begging you…"
Am I hearing this wrong…?