Alive.
It's a feeling that no one could describe exactly what it meant. But for a certain individual, it was pitch black.
Nothing could be seen except the feeling of being submerged underwater, unable to move a single bit, as they lost the ability to think.
The concept of time has vanished, and the brain has fallen into hibernation as it is unable to sustain itself.
After who knows how long, a light appeared, piercing through the darkness.
---
In a small house, a young woman was lying on her bed with a young man standing by her side.
An old-looking woman stood near the end of the bed with a blanket, covering her arms and the young woman's leg.
"Congratulations, it's a boy, " the old woman announced as she cut the cord with a pair of scissors.
"I knew it! I told you this one was going to be a boy. I told you, " the young woman yelled in excitement.
"Yeah, yeah. We can finally stop here. No more babies."
As the young woman tried to reach for the baby, the old woman remained still, and a frown appeared on her face as she kept the crying baby in her arms.
"Um, is there something wrong?" The young woman curiously asked.
"I might need to take my words back... The baby might be a girl. I don't know which one exactly."
"What?"
Both parents asked in confusion, unable to understand what the old woman meant until she finally handed the baby over to the wife.
"It's a boy. What do you mean it's a girl?" The man asked in confusion, noticing the baby had clear male genitalia in the front.
"Honey, this..."
As his wife lifted the baby, the husband instantly realized what was wrong. There was a small entrance right below the male genitalia.
It was a thing only a woman would have on their body. Not something that a typical man would ever have on their body.
"How could this be? It doesn't make sense," The man asked, looking all confused as he hoped for an explanation from the midwife.
"I think I know what it is exactly... There have been cases of this happening in an ancient text I had once read."
The old woman's answer reignited some hope in the two parents, knowing they weren't the only outliers facing this.
"Was it a good thing or a bad thing?" The wife nervously asked.
"Their life is going to be extremely difficult when they grow up... I heard some churches might view the baby as a deviant or a curse."
"What should we do? Is there some sort of magic or surgery to fix it?" The husband urgently asked, his face starting to look a little desperate.
"Well, there is some magic that can change one's gender temporarily. But I'm afraid there is no permanent solution... If you guys really don't want the kid, I can take it——"
"No, we'd like to keep it."
The wife declared, not hesitating a single bit, compared to the husband, who still looked a little hesitant to deal with the weird baby in her arms.
In the end, he remained silent, respecting his wife's choice.
"Very well then..."
---
After everything was dusted, the old woman left the house.
The moment she left, a little girl excitedly ran straight into the bedroom before being carried up to the bed.
"Mom! Dad! Do I have a new brother or sister?" The little girl curiously asked.
"Um, well, you have a new sibling named... Alex. Right, babe?"
The man answered as he helped the little girl up to bed, allowing her to see the baby resting in her arms.
"Alex is a good name... Sophia, what do you think about Alex?" The wife asked as she gently lowered the baby, allowing the little girl to see its face.
"It's ugly!" Sophia answered bluntly.
"Hey, don't call your sibling like that." The wife warned as she quickly held the baby back into her arms.
"Ahem, Sophia, you wanted to learn about swords, right? I think it's the perfect time for me to teach you how to use a sword."
"Yay! Let's go!"
With the man and the little girl gone from the room, the wife was now all alone with the baby as she held the baby tightly.
"Do you want to be a boy or a girl?" The wife murmured as it tickled the baby's belly with her finger.
"Waaaaa!"
As the baby suddenly started crying, the wife quickly stopped, her mind thinking she might have scared the baby with the question.
"What am I thinking? They can't even talk yet... Okay, okay, calm down. It's time for your nap."
As the wife swung the baby a little in her arms, the sobbing soon stopped as they fell into exhaustion.
---
One year quickly flew by.
Alex was mostly asleep the whole time, only waking up to eat and sleep as his brain became overcapacitated from trying to remember everything.
Most of his memory was completely fogged out, with name details and people's faces all wiped out as if they never existed.
The only thing that remained was knowledge, from changing a TV remote battery to swimming, to the knowledge of knowing his previous life was a man.
Everything seemed to be fine as he was quick to accept his new life... until he noticed the differences in his body.
His mind soon remembered the 'bug' on his body, or her body. Yet, this wasn't the biggest issue he was facing.
The real embrassment was the fact that he couldn't take care of himself at all. He had to constantly cry to get attention to have his needs taken care of.
It felt extremely embarrassing, needing his mother to come in every time to change his diaper and wipe every part of his body.
All Alex could do to comfort himself was that the dignity lost here was necessary for a baby like him, who had no control over it.
Outside of the diaper embrassment, there was also a second thing that made him feel extremely embrassed.
He had to suckle a woman's nipple. More specifically, a woman who happened to be his mother.
Alex knew the beautiful woman who had been constantly taking care of him was his mother. But he just couldn't help but feel a little guilty.
His mind kept thinking he was taking advantage of her, abusing his status as a baby to touch a woman inappropriately.
However, as more and more time passed, spending time with the woman every day, she was no longer just a beautiful woman.
She was his real mother who was willing to sacrifice all her time to take care of him and meet all his needs.
The only mother in this world who could protect him. The one who gave birth and stayed up late at night just to feed him.
---
Time continued to fly by as Alex began to learn how to walk and even speak in complete sentences.
Soon, he was two years old and was able to walk around the house with his mom or dad nearby rather than being trapped in a small crib.
"Hey Alex, come here. I want to show you something."
A little girl two years older, or a giant if someone were to compare it to Alex, waved for him to come over.
"Hm?" Alex hesitated for a second as he looked over to his mother.
"You can go play with Sophia. Don't hurt yourself, though."
As Alex quickly ran up to catch up with Sophia, the two walked straight into their parents' room.
"What are we doing here?" Alex asked curiously.
"You're about to have another sibling! Aren't you excited?" Sophia pointed out.
"Why would I be excited over that?"
Alex knew his mother had been pregnant again, as she had been sitting on the sofa most of the time with that big belly of hers.
"Come on, Alex, you don't want a little sister or a little brother? We'll have another person to play with at home."
"Eh, I don't really care."
Seeing Alex looking uninterested, Sophia went over to the toy box to take out some toys.
"Hmph, you sound like Dad more and more every day."
"Yeah, what's wrong with that?"
Alex's question made Sophia fall into silence, but she wasn't just going to let that slide as she pulled out a toy sword from the inside.
"How dare you talk back to your sister?"
As Sophia started charging towards him with the sword, Alex immediately bolted out of the room.
"Mom! Sophia is trying to hit me!"
---
As Alex reaches four years old, the entire family's attention is focused on Alex's little sister, Mary.
While Sophia became old enough to go outside to play with the neighbor, Alex remained indoors, acting as his little sister's playmate.
The only free time he was given was when Mary fell asleep, allowing him to pick up the books from the bottom of the bookshelf.
Even though he couldn't understand a single word inside, the pictures next to the words gave him an understanding of the outside world.
He was clearly living in a fantasy world where swords and magic existed to fight things like dragons and monsters.
His suspicion was only further confirmed when, one day, he walked past his mom in the kitchen.
Right before his eyes, she cast some sort of spell that made a flame shoot out of her finger.
There was no single fuel source or ignition—just open flames that appeared out of thin air.
When he asked her about magic, she didn't bother hiding at all as she confirmed that magic existed in this world.
She even repeats the magical flame right before him and tells him that she is a mage herself.
It planted a seed inside his mind, a sense of direction for his new life that he could aim for. A goal that he never had in his previous life.
Unfortunately, he met reality when he started asking his mom to teach him magic. He was told with a single phrase.
"You're too young for this."
Although the initial attempt failed, it was clear to both parents that Alex wanted to do something other than be Mary's playmate every day.
The very next day, his dad handed him and Sophia a wooden sword so they could be trained in the art of sword fighting.
It was exciting at first, but it soon became a mundane task. But knowing he was living in a magical world was enough for Alex to endure anything.
He just has to be patient. Wait until it was the right time to ask again.