"Takeshi? I thought you were in a meeting."
Rin looked up, surprised to see him. She couldn't believe he could just walk out of a Jonin meeting.
"Meow~ It wrapped up, so I came out," Takeshi lied smoothly.
He wasn't being entirely dishonest. The rest of the briefing wasn't particularly relevant to him, so his presence wouldn't have made a difference. He'd left a Shadow Clone behind mostly as a courtesy to Orochimaru and the others, since skipping out entirely would have been poor form. Leaving a clone meant he was technically still participating, and who knew, maybe a topic would come up that he could contribute to.
Of course, the real reason was the points. With a clone present, he might be able to snag a few. If not, there was no real loss, it was just a bit of chakra he could recover with a good night's sleep.
Kakashi, who was tidying his sleeping bag, shot him a sideways glance before silently returning to his task.
'Over? As if,' he thought. 'That cat's a pathological liar. He definitely just snuck out.' Still, the others were probably relieved to have him gone, Kakashi mused.
"Oh, does this mean we'll be working with you?" Obito asked, looking over. He found Takeshi far more reliable than Minato, though the cat was often annoying, he was always diligent and responsible. Minato-sensei was dedicated too, but for some reason, he always seemed to run into trouble.
"Meow~ We'll probably be working together, but I'll still be leading Guy and his team. As for the specific mission..."
Takeshi let the words hang in the air, pausing for a moment.
Kakashi and Obito leaned in, waiting for him to continue. Rin's eyes were wide with curiosity, but the cat simply flicked his tail.
"Meow, I'm off. I need to go check on my three."
And with that, he was gone.
'That's it?' Kakashi and Obito thought, almost in unison. 'What about the rest of it?' That cat was infuriating. His little games were getting more and more annoying, and it was impossible to see them coming. What a jerk.
"Maybe he can't talk about it yet," Rin said, scratching her head with a gentle smile. "We should hurry and finish packing. Once we're done, we can see if anyone needs help."
Kakashi nodded silently. What else could he do? It wasn't like he could chase the cat down and challenge him to a fight he knew he couldn't win. The helplessness was infuriating.
'Good,' Takeshi thought as he strolled away. 'The more frustrated they get, the more points I earn.'
He did miss the days when they were just starting out. Back then, Kakashi and Obito were so green that the smallest provocation would get them to dutifully hand over points. Now, it took more than a few cheap shots to get a rise out of them.
'They've grown up,' he thought with a strange sense of paternal pride. Thanks to him, Kakashi was a real person now, not just the lonely orphan he used to be. His contribution was immense. Konoha owed him a debt of gratitude.
The black cat wandered through the camp, lost in his own self-congratulatory thoughts. Every time he passed the edge of a tent, the Jonin inside couldn't help but sigh in exasperation. A ninja so brazenly skipping a wartime briefing to take a leisurely stroll was probably a first in the history of the village.
They all decided it was best to just ignore him. For a Jonin, this was surprisingly difficult, they were trained to be constantly aware of their surroundings, and it was hard not to notice the black cat sauntering past behind them.
Fortunately, Takeshi wasn't mad enough to pace back and forth. If he had been, Orochimaru might have felt compelled to invite his *actual* body in for a chat.
He found Guy's team in their tent. The three of them had already packed their sleeping bags and other gear. Might Guy was doing a handstand, Genma was idly twirling a kunai to train his finger dexterity, and as for Ebisu, he was meticulously drafting a new training plan. All three of them were training in their own way.
"Meow~ You three, with me."
"Yes!"
"Sensei, wait for me!"
The three of them scrambled to follow him out of the tent. Takeshi led them to a small, open space just outside the camp. According to Shikaku's plan, their teams would almost certainly be involved in the next mission. If it was a high-difficulty assignment, their safety wasn't guaranteed. He needed to teach them a few more things to keep them alive.
'First, their mindset,' he decided. "This time, you might be facing some truly difficult missions, so I'm giving you one last lesson, meow."
"Yes, Sens-" *Thwack.* "Ouch."
"Pay attention," Ebisu said, lowering his hand from the back of Guy's head. He then knelt quietly before Takeshi, the very image of an attentive student.
Guy, rubbing his head, looked like he wanted to argue, but after seeing Ebisu's posture, he just sighed. Forget it. He might as well listen.
Both Guy and Genma straightened up and fell silent, their gazes fixed on the black cat as if they were in a classroom lecture.
'Ebisu really does have a knack for this,' Takeshi thought. 'Maybe he should suggest a career change.' The thought vanished as quickly as it came. He looked at the three of them seriously. "I'm going to teach you the single most important rule on the battlefield."
"Mhm, mhm, mhm," Guy nodded rapidly, his expression earnest.
"Survive."
The three of them just stared, confused. What kind of advanced secret was that?
"Meow~ To put it simply, you prioritize hiding and use sneak attacks only when necessary. You prioritize long-range attacks and use close-range combat as a last resort. Also, when you're fighting Suna ninja, what you see isn't always real, so you must confirm your opponent is the real one before you engage. Avoid getting hit if you can, because..."
He'd claimed he would keep it simple, but the cat just kept talking.
Guy and Genma were focused at first, but by the end, they were a little lost. It all sounded very complicated, but the core message seemed to be: be a coward.
Survival above all else.
Just as the two of them thought they understood, nodding slightly, they heard the black cat say, "Meow, you two should learn from Ebisu."
'Ebisu?' Genma and Guy turned their heads. They saw Ebisu holding a small notebook, his pen flying across the page. Genma craned his neck and managed to read some of what he'd written. The first part was a direct transcription of Takeshi's words, but it was followed by analysis and interpretation.
"On the battlefield, conceal your presence and focus on assassination strategies."
"Engage from long range whenever possible. Be wary of poison and avoid unnecessary close combat. Keep all movements concise to prevent wasted energy."
"Suna ninja puppetry is deceptive..."
Ebisu looked up, adjusting his dark glasses. He glanced from the black cat to Genma and Guy, a bewildered look on his face. "Uh, what about me?"
"Nothing," Genma said quickly. "Let me borrow your notes later."
"Me too," Guy added.
Takeshi looked at the notes, then nodded with a face full of approval. "Exactly. That's what I meant."
"Thank you for the affirmation, Sensei," Ebisu said, looking thrilled but trying to maintain a calm expression.
"Read it over," Takeshi told them. "Once you're done, I'll teach you something new."
The three boys huddled together, poring over Ebisu's notes. Takeshi watched from the side, a wave of emotion washing over him.
'Look at that comprehension,' he mused. 'The kid could turn a mess of instructions into a perfect mission scroll. It's a rare talent.'
It seemed being a teacher really was the best path for Ebisu.
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