"Husband!" He grabbed me as soon as we were alone and pulled me in so close to him with so much force and rage that I was rather surprised that he didn't snap me in half right there and then. "So you are comfortable sending me off to another woman for information over our marriage, wife?" "Husband, please let me go and I shall explain…" "How could you do it? Is this your revenge for leaving me alone in the brothel? Do you really wish to inflect such pain upon me!" "Husband you are scaring me now, please let me go!" I had no idea what was happening to this man, but he was nothing like the man that I had entrusted my heart, soul and body with when I fell for him. I had put down his new and aggressive outbursts down to the side effect of the medicine that he was taking to keep himself sober, but it honestly felt to me as if hardly anything within him had changed at all. "Of course I would never hand o you over to another woman…" "So just what the hell is your plan then! Tell me!" "You will tease her long enough to get some information out of her, that is all! Then we will hand her off to your nephew for marriage as soon as she gives you what you want…" He was still so angry no matter what I said, so I had to practically throw myself at him to bring him back to his senses and place his hand on my stomach until it worked. But I still could not forgive the blank look that he gave me when doing so. He was a man full of raw emotions, a nasty temper and a lot of muscles to support him with whatever chaos was going on in his mind. I needed to make him talk to me somehow before his reactions got out of control and he really did end up harming me in the end, so I tried to find ways to distract him whilst the concubine got ready to serve him tonight.
"Forgive me wife…I haven't been myself since I lost out on my opportunities in the palace and I…." "Have you come up with any names for our child yet, husband?" "Well…I have been thinking about it a lot, but I think that…" "My Lord, the concubine is ready and she is waiting for you." I did my upmost best to not show my fear towards him, I even tried to smile a little, but ever since that man found me in the brothel, he had been looking at me as hough he could see through my soul and it paralysed me every single time. As soon as he left, I couldn't help but to collapse onto the floor and I was on the verge of a breakdown when The Mistress Han of all people came rushing into my quarters, looking just as disheveled as I felt. She ran right past the maids and servants and practically ran our nephew over on the way here with the angriest look on her face that I had seen yet.
"Well? Is it true! That maid is actually serving my man? My husband?" "Your husband? Are you sure about that? Is he really your husband, HuiJae? Tell me…have you ever consummated your marriage at all?" I was angry at the sight of her, and even now I had to restrain myself as much as I could for the sake of my unborn child. This bitch was the one who killed the man that I had truly loved with every fiber of my being and replaced him with a much broken, angrier, possessive and ambitious version of himself for me to deal with and pick up the pieces for him. The man who protected me in his father's yangban would have died for me, whereas this man would surely drag me down to the depths of hell with him if it meant that we can be together. Instead of being affectionate as he used to, he demanded it of me at all hours and didn't mind resorting to threats and force to get what he wanted from me. Even now in the most fragile and delicate time of my life, he didn't hesitate to use me to clean up his mess forcibly, which was everything situation under the sun that this woman was forcing upon him and he was taking out his frustrations onto me.
"Of course he is my damned husband, why else would I…" "So why am I the one who has a marriage document with him that is dated back a decade ago? And why am I the only one that is currently pregnant by him?" "What a big belly you have indeed; my own belly was nearing the second trimester when I lost him. My belly wasn't even swollen yet just like yours now before I lost him. But I suppose that your child will be both feared as his father's son and his grandfather's grandson, but then revered by his other grandfather and his uncle. Or maybe you will meet the same fate as my baby did to atone for all of the sins that you have done to me?" "And what sins are those exactly?" "Theft, greed, vanity, envy, the list goes on when it comes to you I am afraid. So why not make your child join mine as you're penance?"
"Didn't you already try that with the poisoned soup?" "What poisoned soup? What on earth are you talking about?" "It is too bad that your last minute plot failed though; just like how you failed to burn myself and my family alive. And because you are the matron of this home, it will fall to you to explain my existence in this home and how it came to be!" "And Hwi? Did he survive?" "That is none of your business you witch! Who are you to call upon my brother when you claim my husband as your own? And shirking your responsibilities to the people that you have hurt and betrayed in this lifetime will not absolve you of your blame you know." "Shut up! Wh are you to talk about blame and guilt when my baby die because of you! Because when The Third Prince had to choose between myself and you, he chose you without a moment's hesitation, just like every always does! Without the company of my man and children, how am I expected to live my life!" "You will live how you lived before since you have never owned any of these things at all; you never have and you never will." "W…what did you just…" "haven't you realised how pathetic you have been acting this entire time? Do you want a baby to guarantee you future or to bind you to a man that you have hurt so much that he will never want you again? The truth is that human hearts are the most difficult to control and if a man does not love you, then even his child that you bare for him cannot keep you in his heart. And if a woman does not cherish herself, then how can she expect anyone to love her at all? My life is at least a little better than watching over an empty room with a sour mouthful and being favoured even temporarily means that I will not have lived in vain at all." "Do not live in delusion just because you are not respectful and submissive like other women are! He even burned down my brothel for you…!" "Your brothel? My husband bought out that place years ago just when you placed me in all of those brothels because he could already guess your plan from a mile away! He bought the place just for me because he knew it was my place of shelter without him. He even gave me some of the shares of his own investments, how else did you think I survived your specific brothel where you bought in that madame to torture me on your behalf? It has been me that has healed him on my own, it has been me that has lead him to accomplish his goals and forge new ways to accomplish success without bribery or any other form of corruption even when I was on my own path to fulfil my own goals! And it is me that he makes love to how many times he washes every single time, so what exactly are you doing here still? What do you want from a man who does not and never has wanted you in return…"
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"It has been me that has healed him on my own, it has been me that has lead him to accomplish his goals and forge new ways to accomplish success without bribery or any other form of corruption even when I was on my own path to fulfil my own goals! And it is me that he makes love to how many times he washes every single time, so what exactly are you doing here still? What do you want from a man who does not and never has wanted you in return…" indeed she was right as I was now too exhausted to deny it any longer as I stood in the only luxurious room in the entire yangban that I handpicked and decorated endlessly to make a home for us both. Yeon was his entire world before he even realised it and I was sick and tired of competing with someone who was inferior to me so much that it cost me everything. I did not want to admit this or look back at that memory; but I do remember him asking his father for her hand in marriage soon after we started seeing each other. I sneaked into his yangban to find hi after he continuously walked out on our dates to go home to keep checking up on her, and it was this specific memory that solidified my resentment towards her in the first place.
"…The Seo family is a fallen one in case you have forgotten; why would I allow you to marry someone with a much lower status than your own? Haven't you brought enough shame and embarrassment upon me already?" "Bu father she really is something special! She has a talent far greater than you or my brother ever possessed! I must marry her before any else gets to have her! Or I shall never marry at all!" "I have never even thought to plan your marriage, so I see no reason for you to bring up the subject at all." "I am not being rash to wilful at all; I am not even trying to coerce you father; but I promise you that she is worth it…" "Just because an ugly duckling grew int a swan overnight, it does not mean that you be the first to propose marriage to her just because you have known her for a longer time…" "I am being sincere about this father! I am wiling to accept everything about her, even her disability! Her goodness, her bad side, her intense love fir me anther hatred towards justice, her clear distinction of gratitude and petty grudges…she needs me as much as I need her!" "You need to stop being so delusional and waste my time with al of this nonsense! Why don't I give you a better job by making you my new poison tester for my food instead? I can save a fortune that way and put you to use after all. The order one's parents, the advice of matchmakers, and the agreement from both parties is something I shall never waste on a lowlife like yourself, not in this lifetime at least." "So you will really continue to delay my future like this? Just because you can?" "Of course." "Just you wait; I will have her no matter what it costs me, even if it is everything that I have worked hard for, I shall restart my life all over again by her side."
I was still mulling over the situation as my feet took me back to my quarters, completely unaware of the new dangers that surrounded me as I found the letter that The Senior Scholar had left behind for me. He was threatening to expose everything that I had done to my man in the beginning as he was getting rather impatient that the golden goose Seo Yeon hadn't called around to visit at her earliest convenience as everyone else in the palace would have. I hand energy to keep trying to make my man see the potential that I had, but now my very life depended upon it before The Lord Nam didn't hesitate to kill me himself for all of my sins that I was desperately wishing that I could take back at any moment now.
