I was at the palace hall together with the king, watching the princesses and princes, kings and queens, as they entered the palanquins. The event was over. Our hard work had paid off. At last, I could sleep at night without worrying about anything.
I gasped when I felt the king intertwine his hand with mine. I looked at him. He was smiling at me, saying that the event was over and they could finally rest. I remembered my confession to Von from last night. I told her that I liked Min Yun more than the king. So much explanation happened, and I couldn't believe those words came out of my mouth.
"Let's celebrate together," he said.
I smiled and nodded.
It took 30 minutes before all the palanquins left.
I sighed. "Congrats to us," I said.
"Let's eat lunch together."
"We should invite Min Yun too."
"Of course." The king called his eunuch and told him to summon Min Yun.
The king and I went to the garden. The food was already served.
"Did you prepare this ahead of time?"
"Yes. I hope you'll like it. I told the royal chef to cook something unusual—dishes we don't usually eat."
I smiled and busied myself admiring the colorful and beautiful flowers.
"My queen."
I turned to where the king was standing.
He was holding a flower and handed it to me.
"Thank you," I said, accepting the flower.
"I mean it..."
I looked at him, confused.
"I like you—or should I say, I'm in love with you."
I was startled by what he said. It wasn't the first time he told me he liked me, but the word " love" was new to my ears.
"I mean everything I say."
"Even after seeing Empress Isha?"
"That was already in the past. I have you now."
"That means you don't like her anymore?" I asked.
He sighed. "Would I be confessing to you if I still had feelings for her? I'm not a two-timer."
That hit me. Two-timer. I think that's what I'm doing now. I don't want to hurt his feelings by telling him my true emotions. What should I do—tell him that I like my cousin? What if he finds out everything about me?
Yes. I shouldn't like the king because, in the first place, I've never been honest with him. I lied to him from the very beginning, and Min Yun was part of the lie. I'm afraid that if the time comes and the king learns the truth, I might ruin their relationship. I don't want him to have hope in me because I don't want to choose him. But what should I do? He has no one else except Min Yun. If I betray him, who would be on his side?
I sighed. This is hard for me. Telling Min Yun my true feelings isn't the important part. I told Von that this shouldn't come out, and she agreed.
"Queen I-jun?" the king called me again. I was snapped back to reality, realizing I was still facing the king.
"Huh?"
"You think that deep? I'm not pressuring you."
"I'm not pressured," I told him, lying again. This time, I felt frightened looking at his innocent face. What if that face turns angry once he learns the truth? What if, instead of love, he ends up hating me?
I sighed again.
"You keep sighing. What's the problem?"
"I was just thinking about the empress," I reasoned out.
"That she still likes me?" he asked.
"No. I'm just concerned if she's starving."
"Do you want me to wake her up?"
I shrugged. "Let her sleep. We'll just invite her for dinner."
He nodded, then held my hand.
"Let's eat now."
"Where is Min Yun?"
"Let's just wait for him while sitting."
When we sat, the king poured tea into my cup.
"Thank you. Let me." I picked up the kettle and poured tea into his cup as well.
"Thank you."
We silently sipped our tea while looking at each other.
"I want to hear your childhood stories," he said.
"Huh?"
"Tell me your story."
I gulped. What story should I tell? I couldn't tell the real one.
Thankfully, I was saved by Min Yun's arrival. I saw him walking alongside the eunuch.
I waved my hand to him so the king would notice that Min Yun was here.
Min Yun walked up to the pavilion and bowed to us.
"Have a seat."
Min Yun sat on the floor. We began eating.
"Thank you, Min Yun," the king said while munching his food.
Min Yun looked at him and smiled. "You don't have to say that. You know it's my job to help you in every way I can."
"Thank you for letting me meet your cousin. If I hadn't, I wouldn't have been able to fall in love again."
That struck me. Did he have to say that in front of Min Yun? Is he not done yet with his confession?
Min Yun looked serious as he stared at me. I just smiled in response.
"I want to ask for her hand again. This time, it's for real."
My eyes widened, and my mouth dropped open in shock. What more is he going to say?
"Is that the reason why you invited me to have lunch with you?"
I looked at Min Yun, who was now frowning. I could sense from his voice that he wasn't pleased with the king's confession.
I glanced at the king, who didn't even seem to notice Min Yun's expression.
"I just want to do it for real—but only with the queen's consent." He looked at me and smiled.
I forced a smile back. I could feel the tension piling up. What if they fought over me? What if Min Yun fought the king? I didn't want that to happen.
"Just don't force her," Min Yun finally said, leaving me hanging. Was he angry at me or at the king?
He stood and bowed to us. "I have many cases to solve. I can't just sit here and celebrate victory."
"Just finish your food," the king said.
"Thank you, but I'm already full."
I looked at his bowl. He hadn't even taken a bite.
He walked away from the pavilion.
I stood as well. The king stared at me.
"I'll go back. I just need to talk to Min Yun," I said.
The king smiled and nodded.
I ran as fast as I could to catch up with Min Yun. He was already far from the pavilion.
My servants ran toward me, but I told them to go back because I wasn't going anywhere far.
"Min Yun!" I called, panting. I placed my hands on my knees, trying to catch my breath.
"Why did you follow me?" he asked, looking concerned.
"You didn't eat," I said, still catching my breath. I haven't run in a while.
"I told you I'm full. Now go back to where the king is."
"Why are you acting like this now? You seem mad."
"Do I have to explain every feeling I have, Teresita?"
That name stopped me. It's been a while since I've heard it.
"Do I have to explain to you why I feel this or that?" he raised his voice.
"Min Yun, you're shouting at me," I said calmly.
"I can't let him confess in front of me. It hurts me," he said, his voice revealing his pain.
"I'm jealous," he continued.
That made me stop. He's jealous… He didn't want the king to confess in front of him. He's jealous—because of me.
"We're both in love with you. I don't even know if I stand a chance. He's the king—the most powerful one. How can I compete with him?"
I wanted to tell him that I liked him too, but the words wouldn't come out. I didn't want to hurt the king just because I preferred Min Yun over him.
Now everything's complicated. I created this mess. If only I hadn't come back, I wouldn't be feeling this way.
"Just tell me if I have a chance. If you prefer the king over me, then I'll let you go."His words struck me. How could I explain this? How could I tell him what I was feeling?
"Min Yun, just please…"
"Please, what? Should I stop? Should I forget you?"
"You shouldn't be mad at the king. He only has you," I replied, avoiding his question.
He frowned. "How about me?"
"You have your family and friends. He only has you. Don't you remember you told him you'd do everything to protect him?"
He didn't respond. He just stared at the ground.
"Min Yun… Don't hold a grudge against the king just because he likes me. Don't let your feelings ruin everything. You've been with the king since you were kids. I only exist here because of an accident."
Still, he didn't respond.
"Min Yun," I said, reaching out to touch his sleeve, but he stepped back.
"Just forget we talked today," he said, then walked away.
I stood there, watching him walk off. Is this the moment he decides to never speak to me again?