Golden Festival Day 16
Odd Jobs opened at its usual hour.
The smell of croissants baked by Shinatsu drifted through the kitchen. And Kagura stood in the middle of the cafe looking absolutely, unquestionably, ferociously betrayed. Not by a person. But by capitalism.
Kagura: "Three miles…" she muttered, staring at her phone. "Three miles away. They built a perfectly polished, professionally staffed, beautifully decorated corporate cafe… THREE. MILES. AWAY."
Diego, who was sweeping, nodded solemnly: "Tragic."
Shinatsu: "Looks like this is the end for Odd Jobs. They're gonna take all of our customers," she said sarcastically."
Kagura: "No. This is war."
Chifuyu: "I think you're overreacting."
Iris behind Chifuyu whispered: "She's definitely overreacting."
Chifuyu: "You see. If Iris thinks you're overreacting, you definitely are."
Ariel: "I don't mind competition. If they don't have donuts though, it won't be much of a fight."
Chifuyu: "I hate to break this to you Ariel, but people don't usually go to cafes for donuts."
Ariel: "Ha! Next you're gonna tell me penguins are real creatures."
Chifuyu and Iris stared at her blankly.
Diego: "Ariel, penguins are real."
Ariel walks away: "Lalalala, I can't hear you."
Kagura wasn't listening. She was pacing like a commander preparing to invade a nation: "Odd Jobs is more than a cafe," she declared. "It's a home. A sanctuary. A community. A haven. A—"
Beatrice interrupted gently: "A place where you once tried to sell deep-fry salad."
Kagura: "Every cafe needs to have some kind of dish that defines who they are!"
Caesar: "That was unmistakably a one-of-a-kind dish."
Shinatsu: "And you thought that would be it?"
Nicholas adjusted his apron: "Kagura, what do you want to do?"
Kagura: "What do I want to do? I want… to destroy them."
A long silence.
Then Shinatsu cleared her throat: "You mean… metaphorically, right?"
Kagura nodded with deeply suspicious confidence: "Of course. Metaphorically."
Shinatsu: "…Right."
Kagura slammed her hands onto the counter: "Operation Reconnaissance begins NOW!"
Nicholas: "Reconnaissance?"
Kagura: "Yes." She pointed to her chosen soldiers. "Shinatsu. Diego. You're with me. We will infiltrate the enemy cafe and study their every move."
Diego saluted: "Roger that! Odd Jobs Intelligence Division reporting for duty!"
Shinatsu stared at him: "That doesn't exist."
Diego: "It does now, because it sounds cool."
Shinatsu: "It does not."
Kagura clapped her hands with excitement: "We need disguises. We move out in twenty minutes."
Diego: "Now we're talking."
Shinatsu: "We have disguises?"
Kagura smiled: "Oh. We have disguises."
Twenty minutes later, the Odd Jobs trio team stood outside the cafe's entrance. Kagura looked normal. Cute cardigan. Single ponytail. No suspicious aura. Shinatsu also looked normal. Stoic expression. Casual clothes with her hair down. Practically invisible. Diego… looked like a criminal trying very hard to not look like a criminal. He wore a long beige trench coat, giant sunglasses, and a fedora pulled low enough to obscure half his face. He also carried a newspaper under one arm despite being inside a digital age.
Kagura face-palmed: "Diego. Why."
Diego: "This is how spies dress!" he whispered loudly.
Shinatsu pinched the bridge of her nose: "You look the most suspicious out of all of us."
Diego: "No, no, this is perfect." He rolled his shoulders confidently. "Watch and learn."
He marched toward the cafe's glass doors which slid open automatically. He flinched like it tried to attack him. Shinatsu sighed. Kagura held back laughter. Inside, the new cafe gleamed with polished elegance. Rows of pastries glistened behind glass. Baristas in eye-catching uniforms worked with professional speed. Soft jazz music played. Even Shinatsu had to admit it was impressive.
Kagura narrowed her eyes: "Look at them. Trained. Efficient. Probably brainwashed."
Shinatsu: "Or just professional."
Meanwhile, Diego sat in the corner like a raccoon and pretended to read his newspaper. Every customer turned to stare.
A baby caught Diego's hard gaze and started crying. The two had to go in to intervene. They sat next to Diego but didn't make it look like they knew each other.
Kagura: "Diego. You're supposed to blend in."
Diego: "I am!"
Shinatsu: "You are the opposite of blending in."
Diego ignored her, continuing to pretend to read the newspaper. Then, with what he believed was stealth, he pulled out his phone and snapped a photo of the menu. The camera shutter sound echoed across the café at full volume.
Everyone looked at him again. Even the baristas.
A barista approached: "Sir, would you like to order?"
Diego lowered his sunglasses just enough to give a dramatic, mysterious glare: "There's 5 things you should never do in life, and you just did one of them. Never rush a man to place his order."
Barista: "Apologies, sir."
He knew Diego was full of it but went along with him anyway."
Kagura text a groupchat she had just made with the 3 of them: ABORT! ABORT!
They dragged him outside before he made even more of a fool of himself.
30 minutes later, Kagura and Shinatsu returned inside, this time with new disguises. Kagura wore glasses and a hat that somehow made her look like a celebrity trying to avoid paparazzi. Shinatsu wore a mask and tied her hair differently. They ordered subtly. One latte. One matcha drink. Two pastries. They sat in a booth and took a synchronized sip.
They both froze.
Kagura: "…Damn."
Shinatsu: "This is good. Like, really good."
Kagura: "Worryingly good."
Shinatsu: "Should we be admitting this?"
Kagura: "Only to each other."
Shinatsu: "These guys might actually be our competitors."
They sampled the pastries.
Kagura frowned: "Okay. Okay, this is unfair. They have a top chef."
Shinatsu took another bite: "Well, I can make pastries as good as this."
Kagura: "That's the spirit!"
Shinatsu: "Let's sample more of their menu."
Kagura and Shinatsu returned to Diego still in trench coat. Kagura was still drinking one of their refershers. Shinatsu was holding a notepad like she was writing an academic thesis.
Diego: "How'd it go?"
Shinatsu: "We should definitely be worried."
Diego: "It's that good, huh? I'm actually getting hungry, maybe I should—"
Shinatsu: "Absolutely not."
Kagura: "Alright, let's observe. We need intel on everything, foot traffic, popular drinks, and busiest hours.
Shinatsu wrote notes in terrifying detail:
People heavily favor the strawberry cream latte.
Biggest rush is between 1–3 PM.
Their presentation is impeccable.
Diego's disguise continues to attract suspicion.
Diego scoffed: "Suspicion is part of the job."
Shinatsu: "If you're a moron, then yeah I'm sure it is."
Kagura kept watching a constant stream of customers enter the cafe: "That's… a lot of people."
Diego: "We get a lot of people, yet somehow it pales in comparison to what I'm seeing right now."
Shinatsu: "This cafe is already well-known that just opened a store in an area with higher traffic than us."
Kagura: "We can beat that."
Diego: "Can we?"
Kagura: "Of course! Odd Jobs has heart. Soul. Emotion."
Ariel: "And donuts."
Everyone jumped.
Kagura: "Ariel. Why are you here?"
Ariel: "I wanted to see how this cafe compared to ours." Ariel stared at the cafe for a long moment, seeing how busy it was. "…We should burn it down."
Kagura put her hand on her chin: "Hm…"
Shinatsu: "NO you lunatics!"
Ariel: "I was just joking."
Kagura: "Yeah, Shinatsu. Relax a little."
By late afternoon, they had witnessed: At least 300 customers go inside, a near-constant flow of orders, couples taking romantic photos, vloggers reviewing pastries, and Diego getting approached by police for looking suspicious. The sun began to set. The stakeout felt eternal.
Kagura pressed her palms together in thought: "We need something big. Something bold. Something that tells the world: Odd Jobs is the best cafe in District 4."
Shinatsu: "Our menu has been pretty normal. If we throw in some specials and expand it, that'll give us a boost."
Diego suddenly snapped his fingers: "I've got it.
Kagura: "What?"
Diego: "A promotional video."
Kagura blinked. Then lit up like he handed her the key to salvation: "A promotional video ON SHIOGRAM."
Diego: "Yes!"
Shinatsu: "That sounds good too, but I think upgrading our menu should come first."
Kagura: "No, we have to do the PV before anything!"
Shinatsu: "…Sure."
Diego: "We gather the whole crew. We make the most dramatic, over-the-top, eye-catching commercial known to mankind. We post it. We go viral. BOOM. Customers everywhere. The other cafe doesn't stand a chance!"
Kagura: "Diego."
Diego: "Yes?"
Kagura: "You're a genius."
Diego smirked and pushed up his sunglasses: "I know."
Shinatsu exhaled heavily: "I suppose chaos is inevitable."
Kagura stood up with dramatic determination: "Operation Promotional Video begins at dawn!"
Shinatsu: "Shouldn't we discuss actual details?"
Kagura: "No time!"
Diego lifted his trench coat like a cape fluttering behind him: "Odd Jobs will rise."
Shinatsu rolled her eyes and made her way back without them.
Returning home, Kagura and Diego came bursting through the door like victorious warriors returning from a grand adventure.
Chifuyu looked up from wiping a table: "How'd it go? Shinatsu said you guys came up with some brilliant idea."
Kagura pointed dramatically at Diego: "He had a vision."
Diego smirked: "We're making a promotional video."
Ariel gasped: "Can I be the star?"
Diego: "No, the star will be me."
Iris peeked out from the kitchen: "Do I have to be in it?"
Kagura: "Yes!"
Nicholas nodded: "A promotional video sounds great."
Beatrice: "I'll record it."
Shinatsu already looked exhausted: "You guys can figure out the details, I'm taking a shower."
Caesar stepped out from the hallway holding a broom: "If this involves acting, count me in."
Kagura: "Everything is falling into place."
Diego: "The title will be Beat the Corporate Café."
Chifuyu: "Please rename it."