Marcus
Qadir dragged his cigarette so hard the paper seemed to retreat in an effort to keep up. His hand trembled when he said, "How could they just vanish? How can you and Louis not figure this out?"
Mindlessly, I took one of my black nails and gouged across my forearm, drawing blood. It didn't help.
"What are you doing? What the f— is wrong with you?"
"It was Samuel." I kept my voice flat. "You know it was. I blame you for not rigging the auction. You had a sure way to control him."
In my periphery, he took another puff instead of commenting. Our old relationship was over, and after moving higher up in the succession than him—he smoked more. But he'd always been my tormentor; now I was my own. Worse when I thought about her. I rubbed over the cut I gave myself, and my body let me know I had to hurt for the turmoil to leave. Only then could I think.
"I've done what I can to find them. Liam isn't monitored. Samuel edited their feed. They used a teleporter—"
"No, impossible! Nevin's been in the tunnel for weeks, being tortured. Your guards saw nothing. What did Bertram say?"
"He lifted his hands in the air. And executed Soren's watcher."
The smell of blood filtered through the foggy air. Not only my own, but also all the people I had to kill to find them.
"True, the problem must lie on En-gannim's side. You'll have to look into it."
Could he be any more stupid?
Qadir turned toward his decanter, leaving me to my thoughts.
Soren, the boy I'd known for most of his life, had found a way to get his new wife off the compound. He even manipulated the auction. My fist clenched on the armrest; that night, a painful reminder. How she looked at me for only a few seconds. Instant attraction. Lust that wanted to be unleashed. An innocent girl. Curious. On the brink of finding out all the pleasures vampires could indulge in. How I wanted to be that man… In one moment, I yearned to love her. The next fear followed because I knew I wouldn't be able to. A second later, I was determined to try—and bid to the very end.
My nails dug into my palms, piercing the skin.
Giving up on finding salvation was one thing. Finding it and losing it another. My soul screamed at me, 'She might have been the way out of this isolated existence.'
What was it about her? My whole being demanded I take her home and integrate her into my household… One wife who saw me. Now I had two I couldn't stand. If only I had as much money as Ahasuerus gave me for Rana, Juliet would have been mine.
F—! My nails dug deeper. Fresh pain twisted in my belly.
Five f—ing years had made no difference. How did I ever think leaving Earth would make it all better? Or finding common ground with Qadir. All of it only made me give in to a side of me I fought so hard to master. If I was going crazy then, I was now maddened by the prospect of living out this life… If only I had looked around like Kubra suggested, I might have found her.
The separation seemed impossible to suppress.
I pulled my nails from my skin and wiped my hand on my leg. Those intense emotions flooding my soul and mind drifted away just as quickly. I could think, and Juliet was only a lost want.
It is what it is—I suppose.
"Marcus! How far is Rodrigo with the serum?"
"Close. One cub away… In a few days, we release in Hawaii."
"Good, get down there and make sure he's working for his freedom."
My feet struggled to get me out of the house. Sluggish, I chose to walk to the lab. My clarity didn't last long. Juliet and Soren's wedding night drifted in to haunt me. I was ordered to go over every detail of their lives... And now every detail was imprinted as more wants.
What a revelation. Soren had for years groomed her to hate this place… Me! Someone she didn't even know. He also had a way to channel all her clever, common sense to be the total opposite of any wife here. He gave her freedom and understanding—and for that—he got a wife who, within reason, behaved and yet still loved him… Enjoyed him.
I dragged my nail over my skin, next to the fresh cut, just to get a hit of the deep ache in my bones.
Soren had worked hard and earned the reward of what I had seen when I met her. Honesty. Transparency. A fire behind her eyes.
The loss of the connection they shared was enough pain; I didn't have to hurt myself again. I didn't just feel crazy, but wrong!
"Why?" I muttered, exiting the elevator, walking past the numerous cubicles with demons inside. Not even god would do this.
Rodrigo looked over his shoulder as I came in and said, "Why what?"
Ignoring him, I sat on the steel table in the middle of the floor. What was it even here for? Why would he expect anyone to be on it? The cubs were tied on the counter. Did he sometimes take out his experiments and experiment on them? I laughed at my own joke, looking at the woman in the box. My amusement was replaced with disgust. Also, a new emotion for me. All of it. What I had to entertain to make Qadir's plans pan out.
Rodrigo picked up another flask, wiping it with a cloth, watching me while he buffed.
"Nothing, how are things looking here?"
"Two days."
"Good… I want to get out of here."
"You're very optimistic."
"You think it will take longer for the humans to submit."
"I… have a suspicion," he said with a lingering smile.
Rodrigo had been awfully weird since I found him. The crazy was gone, and he seemed so—sane. As if he had found his purpose in life… This? I looked around.
"Come on, Marcus, I'm never going to see you again. Indulge me… Dig deep one last time."
I huffed. "No. I gave up… Where you found your way. I lost mine."
"Pitty… I heard some rumors."
This made me laugh. "Oh, yeah?"
His eyes traced my reaction. What? Was it so weird to see me smiling?
"What's so funny?"
I pointed to the roof. "Up there. It's— It's so—"
"I see. They're so serious, and here I'm creating drama like I'm a housewife… Well, I'll tell you anyway. The infected vamps say Nevin's still down there… About some… little woman who escaped." I frowned. "Had I heard wrong?"
Why would anyone care about Juliet leaving?! Or her mother. Sam was important. Liam and Soren male. Intrigued, I asked, "What are they saying?"
"They say the auction was—entertaining. They say she was beautiful and highly sought after… And then she got sold to—Soren." He smiled again, fiddling with the rag in his hand. He laughed, thinking about something. "A no-name boy… had the final say."
Weird way to put it, but sure, he came in at the last second and took her.
"And… the five disappeared off the face of the earth."
"Do you know something? Did you help them?"
He lifted his chin and laughed. "No," he said between subsiding mirth, "No, I'm disappointed I missed her… I would've liked to speak to someone who didn't let this place get to them… If you had left me at Samuel for another few days, maybe both of us could've seen her."
"I would've brought her back."
"Ha. Liar! You've always been quiet and with no follow-through."
"No. I lost what I was waiting for six years ago, and I don't even know what it was. I lost… the idea that anything would ever change.
Rodrigo's smile spread over his lips. Why was he so happy? "I think you're right… This feels permanent—not like the others… She'll probably kill you first if she finds out about your wives."
Okay? He was still crazy. Making no sense.
After wiping another flask clean, he said, "I guess I was the one variable he didn't take into account… Like she would say, 'What to do? What to do?"
"What are you talking about? Who's going to kill me? You know something."
He giggled like a schoolboy. "No, right now I'm in the dark… But I'll get out eventually if your father doesn't kill me… Or you."
I met his eye. "I didn't do it then, and I won't do it now."
"Why? If you've gone so far off the path of let's say, righteousness—" I scoffed. "Then why won't you kill me? If you find them, what do you think will happen? What did your grandfather say?"
"I wasn't privy to the adult conversation. There I'm treated like a f—ing baby." I slid off the table, ready to leave. "They will be found! And I don't know what will happen."
Before I stepped through the door, he said, "Marcus, I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"Everything… There was never anyone to show you they loved you… And I'm sorry someone took that from you. We saw greatness in you… A strength none of them possessed."
I looked back over my shoulder and turned to face him.
"If one thing changed… It was Samuel. He's the one who gave up."
"You mean why they're all here, Liam, Samuel… I can't think Qadir was part of it."
"No, I don't mean start a war… But if anyone can set this straight, it's you. You were first, and in the end, it matters."
First? First in what? I'd never been a first for anyone. "Why don't you just come out and say what it is you know you have to say?"
"Because if we die—we die. And the stakes are so much higher now; the sacrifices too much to bear. We might not get another chance… I'm afraid—"
"Of me?"
He dipped his chin. "You seem broken." He pointed at my arms. "It might end worse than it began."
"F— I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm tired. I'm going to go drink myself to sleep."
Rodrigo sighed as I walked out.
In the elevator, I rolled down my sleeves.
Sunlight hit me, and I just wanted to leave Earth. For good. Take my two wives and stay there. Maybe my brain would work once I was off Earth.
The confusion drove me to Qadir's house, not to Louis's, where I would find a willing drinking partner, nor my own, where my wives were waiting. No, my feet carried me to the one person who might be able to help, and also why I haven't seen Agatha in six years… Avoiding her disappointment had been crucial to pushing through. And I needed to say goodbye before I left for good.
She wasn't in the kitchen. I moved through the house, asking servants where she was. No one knew. Her room was empty. Servant's quarters?
To get there, I had to walk past Qadir's office. Strange sounds came from inside, and I stopped at the partly open door. My mother's face was pressed against the table, held in place by four strong arms. "You will tell me where they are? You are the only other person who knows about it… Marcus was too young to remember! Now! Did you tell me the truth?"
She nodded.
"I don't believe you…" Qadir headed for his cupboard of whips and chains. "Samuel was here, wasn't he! After I strictly forbade you to go near him and Louis! Or is he the problem? Louis. You let him communicate for you."
Agatha shook her head, a twisted expression on her face.
Qadir came into view with one of the more serious inflictors of pain and pulled it through his hand, letting her see it. The two men listened to this silent command. One let go, circled her body, and yanked her skirt to expose her ass and legs. The other took both hands, extending them above her head to hold her in place.
Qadir leaned close to her ear. "I'm going to f— you for days and in between beat you to an inch of your life. These two men will take turns on you so you never walk out of here… If… you don't tell me how you helped them. I'll only ask you one last time. Did you speak to Samuel?"
Agatha pinched her eyes shut; what else could she do?
Qadir swore and walked around her. My mother's muted cries were all the protest she could give.
I pushed the door open. It creaked, and six black eyes looked back at me. "I wouldn't do that if I were you."
"I told you I won't interfere in your household. Now get the f—out of here and don't interfere in mine."
I stepped inside and slowly closed the door.