The voices in his head were fighting.
One was telling him that he had done the right thing when he decided to keep silent about their relationship. Another was telling him that he was making a big mistake. If he did not speak now, he would miss this chance forever.
So what if Violet was going to reject him?
Their agreement is nearing its end. By the end of the agreement, he won't get to see Violet again. He won't be embarrassed.
The voices were making Ryan hesitate again.
THUD!
Violet shut the door, snapping Ryan out of his trance.
His heart raced as he watched Violet step away from his car.
Ryan decided to listen to the voice in his head. Without giving it much thought, he pushed the door open and stepped out. "Violet!" There was a trace of panic in his voice.
Slowly, Violet turned around. She raised a brow in puzzlement. "Hmm?"
"I still have something to say to you," Ryan said. "Will you listen?"
Violet stared at Ryan for a few bits before she finally nodded.
Seeing that she had agreed, Ryan walked to the passenger's seat and held the door for Violet. A breath of relief escaped his lips as he watched Violet slide into the vehicle. His hands turned shaky, realizing the conversation he was about to have.
"What do you want to say to me?"
"I—" Ryan took a deep breath to compose himself. "I have something for you." He took out a white envelope from his pocket and handed it to Violet. "Here."
"What is this?" Violet eyed the envelope suspiciously. "Can I see what's inside?"
"Sure."
Violet pulled out a piece of paper from the envelope and frowned when she saw what was inside.
It was a check.
Her expression turned uglier when she saw the number written on it. She clenched her teeth and stared at Ryan angrily. "Ryan Chen. What do you mean by this? I thought I'd told you that I don't need your money. Ryan, you are insulting—"
"I know what you're going to say," Ryan said, cutting her words. He raised a hand, hoping to stop Violet from speaking further."But you need to listen to me first."
Violet still looked furious. It took her a while before she finally nodded. "Okay, I'm listening." Her voice sounded impatient.
"Violet," His eyes gazed into hers. "I think I like you. Not the friendly kind of like. It's more than that."
His confession hung in the air as time seemed to stand still.
Violet stared at him with her wide eyes. Her stomach lurched. She couldn't seem to hear what he just told her. "I'm sorry. What did you just say?" She finally said.
"I know that we didn't start off on the right foot," Ryan continued. "I acted like a real jerk when we first met. And I know that we started to see each other because our parents wanted us to." He paused and looked up to see her expression. It was clear that she was still in shock.
Violet avoided Ryan's gaze, and her eyes fell on his trembling hand. She could not help noticing that Ryan was nervous. It probably took him a lot of courage to tell her that he was in love with her. But still, this was all too sudden. She didn't know how to react.
"And I never thought that this would happen, and I don't know how it happened…" He paused and sucked in some air. "But after spending more time getting to know you, I started to like you. I think being around you was not that bad. And I think I might have started to fall for you."
Violet's lips parted. Her hand slowly covered her mouth. Her heartbeat escalated. She was sure that he could hear how her heart was beating rapidly. Her blood gushed to her brain. She felt like she was going to faint again.
"So I thought that maybe we could date each other for real," Ryan suggested, "I know that I'm not a perfect person. I can't say that I'll be good at this relationship stuff. I can't promise that I won't make mistakes, and I can't promise that I won't hurt you in the process." He paused to stare at her face. "But I think I'm willing to give it a try. Of course, only if it's okay with you." Ryan inhaled another deep breath. "Are you willing to give it a try with me?"
Violet felt hot tears behind her eyes. She wasn't sure why tears streamed down her cheek. It's not that she was upset or anything. But perhaps there was something about him that made her want to cry. Perhaps, it was the way his hand trembled nervously, the way he expressed his feelings, the way he sounded so... sincere.
But his feelings and confession were making Violet confused.
She had talked with Sarah about the possibilities that Ryan might like her, but Violet had not made her decision regarding what she felt for him.
Violet enjoyed Ryan's company. But to be with him. To date him… She was not so sure.
After all, this relationship was going to start because of their parents.
"Hey," Ryan whispered. His hands framed her small face, and he wiped away her tears with his fingers. "Were you upset by the things I said?"
She shook her head lightly. In any second, she would start to hyperventilate.
"Then why are you crying?" His gaze softened.
Violet laughed. It's weird how she wanted to laugh and cry at the same time.
Violet bit her lips as she sobered up. She found herself unable to speak. She was embarrassed by her sudden outburst. When Ryan told her that he was in love with her, she spent most of her time crying without any apparent reason. And Ryan had been kind enough to stay with her and console her.
It could be hormones, she decided.
"Were you surprised?"
Violet replied with a light nod. She studied his face and smiled. "Of course. I never thought that you would tell me something like this," she paused and looked away.
Ryan smiled faintly. "Do you think I've gone crazy? Am I making you upset?"
"Sorry," she muttered. "I…" she paused, took a deep breath, and tried again. "I..."
"You don't have to answer me now," Ryan said with a smile. "You can take your time to think it over and give me your answer when you're ready. Is that alright?"