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BUll Sh it: Only time I will remain politically correct fair warning

DEAnotsquishedd
Ellen, you’ve always said ‘be kind,’ but let’s be honest—kindness isn’t always a choice, especially when life decides to dump on you. Your show gets canceled and suddenly you’re off to England, like kindness is easier with an accent and a cup of tea. But hey, you’ve never been afraid to make bold choices—except maybe with your sexuality. Was it really a choice, Ellen, or were you just finally sick of men’s b*******? Because honestly, while you were throwing a tantrum on set, I could’ve used some r e a l help, not just r e e l help. Next time, save the drama for the cameras and bring the kindness to real life, yeah? I mean, is your name DeGeneres or DeJerk? And let’s talk about your ‘helping’—everybody you helped had to be run through the CIA first! Be honest, Ellen: did you skip helping some people because the CIA said you shouldn’t, or because you couldn’t remember if you were hosting a talk show or running a background check? At this point, it’s easier to get into the Pentagon than to get a hug from Ellen! But hey, hosting a Big Chill like that, you must know what being syndicated really means—because after all the drama, it looks like your kindness is the only thing still in reruns. And I mean for the viewer, not for you. So how can you know something like that—how the business really works—and still throw a tantrum every time stuff doesn’t go your way? Ellen, with all that experience, you should know: if you want a happy ending, you’ve got to be kind all the way to the credits! And you know what? I challenge you to actually take your own advice for once—help somebody in actual need. Like me, this time. Because it’s not money I need—I need someone to actually give a s***. so I'm callin BS on your BS, respect fu LL y ©F course! how to be not a dick 101
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Intergalactic conquest with an AI

Rex was just another slave in the corporate machine, a faceless office worker under the shadow of one of the galaxy's powerful megacorps. His life was predictable and dull, an endless cycle of meaningless reports and fluorescent-lit monotony. That was, until that day.... When a new world was discovered on the outskirts of the galaxy, Rex, like countless other low-ranking employees, found himself dragged into a contract clause he’d barely skimmed years ago. The megacorp ordered him and his coworkers to pack their lives into a transport pod and leave for the unexplored planet. Their mission? Establish a colony. Mine resources. Make the company richer. There was no choice, refusing meant ruin. At first, everything seemed manageable. The days were grueling, the nights cold, but progress was steady. The colony was coming to life. Until the excavation team struck something. No one knew what it was at first, a buried hive, a forgotten ecosystem, or something ancient and dangerous. Whatever it was, it unleashed hell. Swarms of enormous, chittering creatures erupted from the ground, their jagged bodies blotting out the sky. The colony fell into chaos. Screams echoed through the air as the bugs tore through everything in their path, walls, machines, and people. Rex barely survived. Bloodied, broken, and pinned beneath the rubble, he should have died there. But in the pitch-black silence of his fading consciousness, a voice spoke to him. Cold. Mechanical. Otherworldly. "Do you wish to live?" When Rex woke, he was no longer the man he’d been. His body was no longer human flesh and bone but something far more alien. His skin shimmered with living metal, his mind infused with the power of Cleo, a mysterious AI from a long-extinct, robotic race known as the Kaelzars. Cleo’s presence pulsed through his thoughts, guiding him and transforming him. He wasn’t just alive. He was reborn. But survival came at a price. Rex was no longer a pawn of the megacorp; he was something more dangerous, something they couldn’t control. As Cleo’s intentions began to reveal themselves, Rex found himself standing on the precipice of war, not just with the bugs but with forces far greater than he could have imagined. This was the beginning of a journey through blood-soaked battlefields and treacherous alliances. Along the way, Rex would encounter allies, brilliant, flawed, and unpredictable, and enemies whose ambitions were as sharp as their blades. These weren’t disposable foes, easily crushed by an overpowered hero. They were cunning, relentless, and human in the most terrifying ways. But then again, in war, who can truly be called a villain? New chapters every day at: [2 A.M GMT+8 Time!]
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